Dr. Nicole LePera

When I was sharing that one of the most difficult decisions, if not the most difficult decision I made, was to take space from my family. And that was because of no fault of what they were doing or not doing. That was because I was so instinctually programmed to just show up in service of whatever they needed in any given moment that I didn't have that space to pause.

When I was sharing that one of the most difficult decisions, if not the most difficult decision I made, was to take space from my family. And that was because of no fault of what they were doing or not doing. That was because I was so instinctually programmed to just show up in service of whatever they needed in any given moment that I didn't have that space to pause.

And as I made that choice to take the time away to give myself that pause regardless of how they were feeling in reaction to it, in fear of how they were feeling, in concern about would they even want to reconnect with me, though very affirmed that I needed that because I couldn't separate myself otherwise. And then I got curious.

And as I made that choice to take the time away to give myself that pause regardless of how they were feeling in reaction to it, in fear of how they were feeling, in concern about would they even want to reconnect with me, though very affirmed that I needed that because I couldn't separate myself otherwise. And then I got curious.

And then I spent time not even shaming myself in terms of what entertaining, asking ourself the question. So practically, again, breaking the habit. A lot of times that means hitting the pause in those moments where we're instinctually compelled to act or play the role. And then not judging ourself for needing time and space to turn inward, to begin to explore, ask ourself.

And then I spent time not even shaming myself in terms of what entertaining, asking ourself the question. So practically, again, breaking the habit. A lot of times that means hitting the pause in those moments where we're instinctually compelled to act or play the role. And then not judging ourself for needing time and space to turn inward, to begin to explore, ask ourself.

What does my body need in this moment, physically, emotionally? What's coming up for me? What sensations am I feeling in my body? What am I feeling that I might want to do with these sensations to help myself, support myself through them? So, of course, these aren't, I think, steps that happen overnight, though. Change happens when we first see what we're doing.

What does my body need in this moment, physically, emotionally? What's coming up for me? What sensations am I feeling in my body? What am I feeling that I might want to do with these sensations to help myself, support myself through them? So, of course, these aren't, I think, steps that happen overnight, though. Change happens when we first see what we're doing.

And then when we give ourselves the time and space without shame, without judgment, we to get curious, to begin to explore, and for many of us, redevelop a relationship with ourselves, one where, yes, the world could still be requesting things of us.

And then when we give ourselves the time and space without shame, without judgment, we to get curious, to begin to explore, and for many of us, redevelop a relationship with ourselves, one where, yes, the world could still be requesting things of us.

We still might want to show up in service of others, as I very much do, though we have a space within those relationships and within that service that we're giving to tend to our needs, our wants, which are changing in any given moment.

We still might want to show up in service of others, as I very much do, though we have a space within those relationships and within that service that we're giving to tend to our needs, our wants, which are changing in any given moment.

Boundaries really simply are limits or space of separation that we can create between us as an individual and all of our relationships. And to relate and to be of service and in true connection and in true self-expression, which allows us to be in an interdependent relationship where I'm me You're you. And together, we can join together in harmony.

Boundaries really simply are limits or space of separation that we can create between us as an individual and all of our relationships. And to relate and to be of service and in true connection and in true self-expression, which allows us to be in an interdependent relationship where I'm me You're you. And together, we can join together in harmony.

We can negotiate to make sure that both of our wants and needs are in consideration for whatever choices that we're making forward. We have to have that space of separation where I don't blend into you. I don't feel responsible for taking care of your needs. I don't feel responsible for your emotions. And that description is really what I learned in my childhood, that there

We can negotiate to make sure that both of our wants and needs are in consideration for whatever choices that we're making forward. We have to have that space of separation where I don't blend into you. I don't feel responsible for taking care of your needs. I don't feel responsible for your emotions. And that description is really what I learned in my childhood, that there

wasn't separation, that I was defined by my achievements, by how my mom was present to me in those moments, felt very responsible because of lack of emotional boundaries, would hear moments or be disconnected from my mom in moments where I upset her or disappoint her in my actions or my expression. She would often give me the silent treatment. So a lot of us develop this lack of boundary.

wasn't separation, that I was defined by my achievements, by how my mom was present to me in those moments, felt very responsible because of lack of emotional boundaries, would hear moments or be disconnected from my mom in moments where I upset her or disappoint her in my actions or my expression. She would often give me the silent treatment. So a lot of us develop this lack of boundary.

though boundaries are important, because not only do they allow us to meet our own needs, which allows us to then give, it's the air, when we're on an airplane, right? And the mask falls down.

though boundaries are important, because not only do they allow us to meet our own needs, which allows us to then give, it's the air, when we're on an airplane, right? And the mask falls down.