Dr. Orna Guralnik

I'm not going to like try to make them like me.

Yeah.

Yeah, that's probably the number one thing that goes on.

Yeah.

I think that's a great way to use couples therapy.

I mean, to go through a certain period of time where the therapist really gets to know you and you get to put language around your dynamic and

And then once it gets easier to let go and stop therapy, and if something comes up, go back.

And sometimes it's go back just for a few sessions and you're done.

You just need kind of a reminder or a little tweak.

That's a great way to use couples therapy.

Well, often the problem is usually when people say agree to disagree, they're not really agreeing to disagree.

They're just like exhausted from trying to change the other person.

They don't really agree to disagree because...

I mean, it's a little bit like, I also don't like that statement, agree to disagree, and I don't like it is what it is.

I mean, there are all these statements that people have when they're done thinking, when they can't just keep with the process, and it is maddening.

When you really agree to disagree, the disagreement doesn't end like that.

It ends with, oh, I totally understand why you, knowing you, why you feel that way.

makes sense to me.

I'm in a different place and this is why I'm in a different place, but I understand where you're coming from.

That is a real agree to disagree.