Dr. Orna Guralnik

So you're basically like forcing me to have chicken.

What's your logic?

How do you force another person to have chicken?

So, okay.

So my Tai Chi maneuver would be

All right, let me just understand the contract here between us.

If we want to be in a relationship, I need to agree with your preferences.

That's your idea of a good relationship.

I just want to know what I'm signing up for.

Is it always going to go your way?

I think it's great what we're doing here.

In my mind, what you do then, and that's basically my training as a psychoanalyst comes in here, is what you're doing, at least in the therapy, but people can do it on their own, is you're moving a little bit beyond the concreteness of chicken and steak, and you're talking about the

The contract of the relationship, what is the contract there?

Does one person on some implicit level believe that they're entitled to be the one dictating what's going on?

And if they really believe that, it's usually based on something.

What is it based on?

Is it based on patriarchy?

Is it based on the fact that they're making more money?

Is it based on the fact that that's how they were raised?

Do they actually not really believe in that, but they're trying anyhow?