Dr Paul Eastwick

It is true that like as people go through changes and as they age, like we can look at things like age.

What does that do over time?

As people age, especially like into middle age and all of the things that come with that, there is an overall decrease in people's satisfaction.

Right.

So and look, some of that is related to the fact that challenges emerge as you have kids like jobs are often really hard when you're young.

get into your 40s and 50s.

So you do and probably people get more out of shape too.

So I totally buy that that can be part of that broader age related trend.

Um, so, uh, so, so I do think there is something to that, but if we're thinking about like, you know, differences between people and a lot of the way these studies are done, it's like, I get some attributes on you at baseline.

And then I use that to predict how your partner feels about you, you know, three months later, six months later, you're

We're not talking about the kinds of timeframes in your example, but with those kinds of studies, the attributes that make somebody more desirable, the confident guys and women, the attractive men and women, when you use that to predict long-term relationship success, it just doesn't do all that much.

Okay.

I think it does suggest things about your about your personality.

And I'm certainly not going to suggest that it's necessarily a good idea or certainly not a good idea in all contexts.

But I think the easiest step for people to make is to think of short-term, long-term.

It's not a single dimension.

Let's talk about it as two dimensions, okay?

So some people...

you know, willing to have sex on the first date.

And some people are not.