Dr. Shadé Zahrai

Do you think that happened?

No.

Absolutely not.

Doubt doesn't work like that.

I took it with me because of my self-image, because I was carrying that self-image around, the scars I had.

Again, I came from a wonderfully supportive family and still I had scars.

One of the things as I was doing research for this book is, there's a lot of talk about attachment theory and those early experiences.

What some people experience is a secure attachment style when they're young, they have a supportive environment full of love and validation, and yet still as adults, they feel like they're not enough.

And it could be one of two reasons.

It could be that you feel so indebted to your family that you feel like you need to keep performing for them to make them proud.

The second reason is that you might also have had a sibling who was challenging just by nature of their personality.

And you saw that and you didn't want to be that.

And so you became the opposite.

You became the good kid to be that for your parents.

And you just take that with you.

So that was me.

And then I started feeling guilty about why am I feeling this self-doubt?

I have no reason to.

And so it became this whole big thing.

Anyway, seven years in banking and finance, I eventually found my way.