Dr. Shadé Zahrai

One of the things you said is that mistake that we make when we think we're the only one feeling a certain way, everyone else must be confident.

I'm the only one.

It's called pluralistic ignorance.

Interesting.

I didn't know that word.

Everyone actually feels that way.

I mean, look, we say everyone, probably 95% of people will feel that.

But as you said, your ability to just show up in the discomfort and acknowledge that, hey, it's uncomfortable, but I'm here.

I'm safe.

It's fine.

That makes it easier the next time you do it.

You develop what's called a tolerance for discomfort, and that leads to amazing things.

And then the other thing you highlighted is that

what helped you is this idea of having a purpose and this idea of not making it about you.

It was this concept of self-forgetting that I'd mentioned as one of the, we call it the gift of self-acceptance, is the ability to forget yourself and make it about other people.

So you said, if I have something meaningful to share, which is not about you, that's about adding something to them, that allows those voices to quieten.

Because it's not just you doing it because you want to, or you think you need to, or you think you should.

It's for their sake.

So that's beautiful.

And then I love how you brought in imposter syndrome, which brings us beautifully to the second pillar, which is agency.