Dr. Shadé Zahrai

He would always focus on what was wrong.

And it was always everyone else's fault.

So the very first time that we met, he walked in, he was rushing, he was complaining about the weather and the traffic and the fact that it was so hot in the room.

And he spoke for about five minutes, ranting.

We hadn't even shook hands or sat down.

He was stuck in this litany of grievances.

Finally, we sat down, we started speaking, and what I discovered is that Bruno has a number of common patterns.

He was an endless complainer, chronic complaining about everything.

Not only that, he was very resentful to other people.

He felt like everyone else had an easier life than he did.

Other people's business success was easier.

He felt like he was constantly having to work harder.

The third pattern was blame.

He was constantly blaming others.

other people for issues that he was responsible for.

He was never willing to take ownership.

And the fourth pattern is he would keep reliving past hurts.

So past times that he had been hurt by somebody, someone had double-crossed him, someone had treated him poorly.

He kept sharing that story.

Now, initially, when you're having a conversation with someone...