Eimear Coffey

And I suppose the only way to explain it is I was in constant state of confusion.

It was quite toxic, but in a subtle way.

Do you know what I mean?

Sometimes toxic relationships aren't always big, grand gestures, shouting, calling each other names or verbal abuse or even physical abuse.

Sometimes it can be very, very manipulative.

It was very manipulative.

At the time, I couldn't see it because I was always giving myself to him, to my family.

He had lots of different things going on and I was so concerned about him and his welfare and how are you and are you okay?

And, you know, always the giver, always the people pleaser, you know.

As the months went on, I just knew something was wrong.

My gut was just...

But I kept trying to fix it as well, Brenda.

I kept thinking I can, everybody, you know, the way you convince yourself, everybody goes through rough patches.

Everybody goes, you can't just give up this, that and the other.

And then he would reassure me where we won't give up.

I'll be better.

I'll try better.

Promises, promises, promises.

And we'll be fine for a week.

And then we go back.