Emily Miller
speaker
162 appearances
1 recordings
1 series
first heard Apr 2025
last heard Apr 2025
Emily Miller’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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Appearances
A couple of days. Yeah. Um, so I got taken into hospital. Um, And even though I wasn't dilated enough, because I was bleeding so much, they were like, right, you need to go down into theatre. And I was on a monitor for a... Into what? Theatre.
It's like... So, like, if I wasn't at risk, you'd be, like, in a communal area with other pregnant women in labour. You're labouring with other women here? Yeah.
oh my gosh yeah you're just in one big room with curtains separating you and you can hear everything everything yeah are people like screaming and scared it's scary yeah yeah you hear everything well in the hold in the holding bit first there was people yeah i don't know what to call it that's what you would call it yeah there were people laboring in there yeah so but you can't like hear anything like you're in your own room
where you are yeah yeah i know that's i know it's the difference with nhs well you're just free so the theater is where like high risk goes sorry what yeah yeah yeah so yeah if you're at low risk you're in the communal area but high risk you're in your own private bits because you need to be monitored like there's a nurse on you monitoring you the whole time so i had a thing around baby's heart and a thing around my heart
Um, and then it's kind of like, it's a bit of a blur now, but hours have gone by and then by this point they were like, right, you're actually, you're good to go. You can do your water birth like you wanted to do. Um, so I was like, great.
So I got wheeled into that unit and then they checked me again when I was in there and the amount of blood that she pulled out, she was like, no, no, no, you need to go back that way. Um, so I had to get taken back. So I was like, for fuck's sake, like, you know, your emotions are like this thinking,
what's going on um and hours and hours have gone by and i finally caved into gas and air um and i was sucking on it like no tomorrow i was like babe i don't think this is working she said to me it's not working i was like let me test it i did i was like
Yeah, I don't know if, did you do gas and air?
That's not really as big of a thing. They don't even offer that.
I was like, it's not working.
Yeah, but for me it wasn't touching the sides. I was in so much pain. Yeah, it's so much pain. Yeah, so much pain. I had no idea how painful it was.
more yeah more 36 hours in total yeah so but at some point in them 36 hours i was like i can't do this anymore i can't i like i need i need an epidural i can't do it the nurse kept checking me and i wasn't dilating i think i was only like three four four centimeters at this point um bear in mind you need to get to 10 obviously i know you know that but just anyone listening um
And my waters still hadn't broken either at this point. And I was refusing everything. They're like, do you want us to break your waters? I was like, no, I don't want you to touch me. I don't want to do it all on my own. But then again, it got to the point where I needed an epidural. I genuinely thought I was going to die. That is the pain I was in.
Thinking back, people have been speaking to other mums. I don't think it was normal, the pain I was experiencing.
Yeah, and as I said, I wasn't dialing, so there was no room for him to go. So it was kind of like all these contractions were happening, and it was just getting more and more stuck. Probably maybe fit what happened to you, the whole him getting stuck thing.
but yeah first epidural I had as many top ups as I could and it just wasn't working I was in still so much pain to the point where I was begging them to give me another one I was begging I was crying I was like I need and then The girl that was in the ward with me, she was, I think, quite new. So she was doing everything by the book. And she was like, I can't, I can't.
I was like, you don't understand. Like, I need... And then, luckily, another nurse came in. I just grabbed her. I was like, you need to help me. Like, you need to help me. So she was like, okay, I'll go and get you some help. And by this point, all the doctors and nurses were doing a changeover because it was a new day. So I had to wait for all my notes to be handed over, everyone to...
do a new shift whatever they were doing and i think eventually this is about hour this must be an hour 34 now yeah yeah and eventually i got a second epidural and i think they dosed me up to the max i think i've got a spinal block at the same time as well but the first time in the whole time that she was chilled yeah the first i could breathe like i could breathe i could have a sip of tea like i could eat something what was that whole first part like for you
i mean i don't like seeing you pain in general but that much pain it was just yeah it was horrible i mean that's why i remember so specifically that's one time i was just looking up at the ceiling like i was actually thinking i'm actually gonna die and like i could see you were looking at me and like the tears just streaming on my face like i can't actually i didn't think i could do it i honestly can't get emotional
Yeah, I didn't think I could do it. So it was this point where the nurse was like, Emily, you need to think about a plan B here because this baby's not going to come. And I was like, there's no way I'm having a C-section. That was not any... All the books I was reading, I'd always get past C-section. I was like, there's no way I'm going to have a C-section. I'm going to boss this.
Showing 101–120 of 162 · page 6 of 9
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