Emma Chamberlain

I think the anxiety, the overthinking, the perfectionism and the control freak is all kind of one in the same.

It's all very connected.

But I'm also somebody who struggles with imposter syndrome.

Like I really struggle to feel like I've earned what I have in my life, you know?

And I felt this way since I was a kid.

Like I feel like even in school, I would get good grades.

because I worked really hard, but I still felt dumb.

I was like, I feel like I'm too dumb to have the grades that I have.

I feel like I don't deserve to have an A. I feel like I somehow tricked everyone into thinking that I, well, it's not even tricked everyone into thinking.

I would feel like, I feel like I somehow tricked my way into getting a good grade on the test and I don't actually deserve the good grade on the test.

I've somehow cheated without even cheating.

I've never cheated on a test in my life.

I've always studied and worked hard and done what I needed to do to make it happen.

And still, even then, I somehow always feel like I cheated.

And I feel like that as an adult in my career.

I'm like, I constantly feel like an imposter, that I don't deserve what I have, that I haven't worked hard enough.

And again, that adds to this sort of side of myself where I can't rest because it's like, I don't deserve what I have.

So I can't take a day off because I haven't earned it.

Even if I have, I've convinced myself that I haven't earned it.

And last but not least, this is less of a personal personality trait, but this is just kind of the state of our current culture.