Erin Holland

Because as someone who never got a

down to the day so there was never a day that I wasn't what injection do I need at what time is it refrigerated is it not okay I'm overseas so what time actually is 8 a.m in Sydney oh it's 3 a.m and whatever time it is set an alarm get up do that like to to get that time back will be insane and then to lose it all to a child that then sucks all of that out of you as well it's

bizarre it is it is really bizarre and I think so much of the tangibilities around what happens in the future I've not even allowed myself to try and get my head around but as everyone tells me all your plans go out the window once a baby arrives anyway so I try not to put too many parameters and preconceived ideas in my head because I don't want to be disappointed when you know I get a child that wants to party all night and sleep all day and it's not it's not a possibility

But one thing I will say is at 37, I do feel like I know who I am and I don't feel like I'm going to have a complete lobotomy when I have a child.

probably clip that up because everything may completely change and it probably will, you know, when a child comes into the world.

But I do feel like I know who I am.

I do feel like my career is very important to me and I'm very passionate about being a really good parent and also still having my own career and having my own semblance of myself because I've been Erin for 37 years.

And I don't want to lose that amongst everything else, but...

Yeah.

Well, it's funny actually because he's at the end of his cricketing career but he's starting his brand new career in real estate and developing and everything.

So he's starting a new career but he's very much been one of the couple of us who has been pushing for a child from day dot pretty much.

He is so ready and so excited to be a dad and I do believe him when he said –

you know, I'm happy to be the primary parent when you want to go back to work.

I want to do this.

I want to be, he really wants to be super evolved.

He's all he wants to do is have the Husky on one hand, the baby strapped on the front, the coffin, the other hand, and go for a walk.

And,

He's been in a team environment his entire life where cricket's a very family-orientated sport.

It's very supported in terms of families.

Families travel with the players a lot and he's been around families for a really long time and it's broken my heart that I couldn't give him that.