Faith

And with C-section moms, it can hit a little bit later, I guess.

And about four months into it,

I was in a critical care unit for three days and they did every test known to man.

And it was very physical.

Like the symptoms are physical.

I was having heart problems.

I couldn't, I was nauseous and I didn't eat three meals for a whole year.

It was like, I think from October to October, I couldn't eat.

I lost so much weight.

I couldn't, I wasn't sleeping.

I'd wake up at three o'clock every morning, have an anxiety attack and fall asleep at five.

Yeah.

Um, so it was just like, I lost my identity.

I felt like it was an out of body experience.

Like I was dead, but my brain was making my body get up every day and surviving.

Um, and like I was,

I felt I wasn't suicidal, but like if a car, if I walked in front of a car and it hit me, I would be like, yay, that's great.

It will end it.

Like that's kind of where I was at.

And I remember saying goodbye to my kids because they didn't think I was going to live.