Fran Lebowitz

Now, obviously I didn't know the whole world would go into this machine.

But by the time it did, I was like so removed from it.

I just don't care about it.

I do, because I have my oldest friend, not by age, but by length of friendship.

We grew up together, so we're friends since we were four.

She still calls me Francie, which there's no one alive who even knows who that is.

I know when I was about, I don't remember, when I was about 12 or 13, I said, this is too childish, Francie.

Call me Fran.

Fran.

Correct.

Well, like everyone who could testify to this is dead now.

But my mother was from Connecticut, and we used to go visit her parents all the time.

My mother had a younger sister, also dead.

And when we went to my grandmother's house, the bigger bedroom was my aunt's bedroom because she was five years younger than my mother.

She had lived there longer.

my mother was already in school you know at school so i always said i remember being like young enough to be in a crib which is an infant being put in the middle of that bed while my father and my uncle put my crib together and i described it and everyone said you could not remember this uh but i described it and everyone said well that was the crib so i don't know in my mind uh that's my first memory and who are these parents of yours

My mother's name was Ruth.

Her maiden name was Splaver.

Okay, you've never heard this name.

And you've never heard it because her grandfather, my great-grandfather, when he came to this country from Russia at the very beginning of the 20th century before the revolution,