Freya India
👤 PersonAppearances Over Time
Podcast Appearances
Because it's like the original Mary Ainsworth experiments where the caregiver leaves and they kind of measure how the child responds. You need like a stable, secure relationship to feel confident to go and explore the world. You need to have like something to hold on to, to step off.
Yeah, you need like something to fall back on. And I think that's a big reason why Gen Z are incredibly risk-averse and not resilient is because we don't actually have a foundation to fall back on. So if your parents are divorced and you don't feel that sense of belonging, you're not going to step off into the chaos of the world.
Yeah, you need like something to fall back on. And I think that's a big reason why Gen Z are incredibly risk-averse and not resilient is because we don't actually have a foundation to fall back on. So if your parents are divorced and you don't feel that sense of belonging, you're not going to step off into the chaos of the world.
Yeah, you need like something to fall back on. And I think that's a big reason why Gen Z are incredibly risk-averse and not resilient is because we don't actually have a foundation to fall back on. So if your parents are divorced and you don't feel that sense of belonging, you're not going to step off into the chaos of the world.
You're going to hold back and you're going to find relationships threatening. You're going to find words traumatic. You're going to be scared by it because...
You're going to hold back and you're going to find relationships threatening. You're going to find words traumatic. You're going to be scared by it because...
You're going to hold back and you're going to find relationships threatening. You're going to find words traumatic. You're going to be scared by it because...
Well, I think it's real that obviously your childhood impacts your adult life. I think that's just plain to see. Yeah. And I think it's real that you can kind of play that out in relationships that aren't, you know, so however your parents responded to you, you'll then take that into an adult relationship. That seems very obvious.
Well, I think it's real that obviously your childhood impacts your adult life. I think that's just plain to see. Yeah. And I think it's real that you can kind of play that out in relationships that aren't, you know, so however your parents responded to you, you'll then take that into an adult relationship. That seems very obvious.
Well, I think it's real that obviously your childhood impacts your adult life. I think that's just plain to see. Yeah. And I think it's real that you can kind of play that out in relationships that aren't, you know, so however your parents responded to you, you'll then take that into an adult relationship. That seems very obvious.
But I think where people go wrong now is they forget that, like in the original attachment experiments and the book Attached, it's quite clear that it's not a bad thing to depend on someone and it's not a bad thing to be attached to. Like we are wired to be that way. Whereas I think now where it's going online, it's like you have a problem if you're attached.
But I think where people go wrong now is they forget that, like in the original attachment experiments and the book Attached, it's quite clear that it's not a bad thing to depend on someone and it's not a bad thing to be attached to. Like we are wired to be that way. Whereas I think now where it's going online, it's like you have a problem if you're attached.
But I think where people go wrong now is they forget that, like in the original attachment experiments and the book Attached, it's quite clear that it's not a bad thing to depend on someone and it's not a bad thing to be attached to. Like we are wired to be that way. Whereas I think now where it's going online, it's like you have a problem if you're attached.
Like if you're a young woman who kind of dreams of having a romantic relationship and really wants to depend on someone, now we view you as like weak. There's something wrong with you if that's your ultimate goal. Because we've had it drilled in so much that dependence is a problem. Yeah.
Like if you're a young woman who kind of dreams of having a romantic relationship and really wants to depend on someone, now we view you as like weak. There's something wrong with you if that's your ultimate goal. Because we've had it drilled in so much that dependence is a problem. Yeah.
Like if you're a young woman who kind of dreams of having a romantic relationship and really wants to depend on someone, now we view you as like weak. There's something wrong with you if that's your ultimate goal. Because we've had it drilled in so much that dependence is a problem. Yeah.
And so you see all these people online saying things like, oh, you know, I'm anxiously attached because when my partner feels sad, I also feel sad. It's like, isn't that just like loving someone? You know, you are affected by their emotions. Or they'll say things again like, oh, I always put their needs first. So can you train me out of being like a people pleaser?
And so you see all these people online saying things like, oh, you know, I'm anxiously attached because when my partner feels sad, I also feel sad. It's like, isn't that just like loving someone? You know, you are affected by their emotions. Or they'll say things again like, oh, I always put their needs first. So can you train me out of being like a people pleaser?
And so you see all these people online saying things like, oh, you know, I'm anxiously attached because when my partner feels sad, I also feel sad. It's like, isn't that just like loving someone? You know, you are affected by their emotions. Or they'll say things again like, oh, I always put their needs first. So can you train me out of being like a people pleaser?
And it's like, we used to just call that love. And, you know, that was a trait that we treasured in people, people who put their partner's needs first.