Gabby Bernstein

Walks around with his Nerf gun, you know, and he walks around like, like with his, like his shooter and he's like, I'm the boss, you know, this is like little innocent six year old, but he wants to be the boss because he's protecting himself from that feeling from three years old. Okay. I watched this whole part develop in a person. So an extreme thing happens, big or small.

Walks around with his Nerf gun, you know, and he walks around like, like with his, like his shooter and he's like, I'm the boss, you know, this is like little innocent six year old, but he wants to be the boss because he's protecting himself from that feeling from three years old. Okay. I watched this whole part develop in a person. So an extreme thing happens, big or small.

In the case of Ollie, it was a six year old, right? In the case of me, it was, it was something much more extreme. Hopefully Holly never has to experience that. But whatever it is, we have extreme experiences and we exile them. We exile them. Those are called exiled parts of us.

In the case of Ollie, it was a six year old, right? In the case of me, it was, it was something much more extreme. Hopefully Holly never has to experience that. But whatever it is, we have extreme experiences and we exile them. We exile them. Those are called exiled parts of us.

These are the little, young, traumatized children that had nowhere to go, no one to care for them, no one to support them. And we said, I'm going to lock that up, send them into the basement, don't ever talk to that person, see that part of me ever again. And at three years old, five years old, whatever it is, we start to decide, I'm going to do this to protect myself from feeling this.

These are the little, young, traumatized children that had nowhere to go, no one to care for them, no one to support them. And we said, I'm going to lock that up, send them into the basement, don't ever talk to that person, see that part of me ever again. And at three years old, five years old, whatever it is, we start to decide, I'm going to do this to protect myself from feeling this.

So Ollie's the perfect example. I got bullied. I'm going to start to be the boss so that I never have to feel that fear again of that bullying.

So Ollie's the perfect example. I got bullied. I'm going to start to be the boss so that I never have to feel that fear again of that bullying.

Everyone.

Everyone.

Yeah. And we have, and then lots of different protectors and there's two types of protectors. So you're still tracking with me here. I know you are. I just want to make sure that the audience is still tracking with me. I'm going to take this slow. So exiled parts of the young, traumatized little children don't want to feel those feelings. So they're too extreme, right, Lewis?

Yeah. And we have, and then lots of different protectors and there's two types of protectors. So you're still tracking with me here. I know you are. I just want to make sure that the audience is still tracking with me. I'm going to take this slow. So exiled parts of the young, traumatized little children don't want to feel those feelings. So they're too extreme, right, Lewis?

It's like, how could a child, you can't understand it. Your brain's not able to process it. Most adult brains don't have the ability to process that. Or most parents would say, you're fine, you're fine. Just get shut down. If you even did bring it to somebody, you'd be shut down, right? Especially with, or in cases of, you know, real extreme trauma, you don't feel safe enough to talk about it.

It's like, how could a child, you can't understand it. Your brain's not able to process it. Most adult brains don't have the ability to process that. Or most parents would say, you're fine, you're fine. Just get shut down. If you even did bring it to somebody, you'd be shut down, right? Especially with, or in cases of, you know, real extreme trauma, you don't feel safe enough to talk about it.

shut it down then you build up these protection mechanisms protector parts there's two types of protector parts but in my book i really just focus on one type so we'll focus we'll stay close to that there's managers and firefighters and so the managers are who we talk about in the book because the firefighters are who i want people to go to therapy to work with but the managers are

shut it down then you build up these protection mechanisms protector parts there's two types of protector parts but in my book i really just focus on one type so we'll focus we'll stay close to that there's managers and firefighters and so the managers are who we talk about in the book because the firefighters are who i want people to go to therapy to work with but the managers are

the control-free, you know, for me, I'm just gonna name my managers, you know, like, one would be like Knives Out is another one I named, like, if you with me, I'm like Knives Are Out, like, you know, like, you know. Destroy you, yeah, that's a manager. Vigilance was a manager for me. Just sort of like anxiety was kind of a manager for me. Think about it, anxiety, right?

the control-free, you know, for me, I'm just gonna name my managers, you know, like, one would be like Knives Out is another one I named, like, if you with me, I'm like Knives Are Out, like, you know, like, you know. Destroy you, yeah, that's a manager. Vigilance was a manager for me. Just sort of like anxiety was kind of a manager for me. Think about it, anxiety, right?

If I'm anxious and I'm, you know, moving, moving, moving so fast, like when you first met me, totally out of my body, hadn't remembered the trauma yet, totally scared. when I think about that time, you know? That anxiety was actually a form of protection.

If I'm anxious and I'm, you know, moving, moving, moving so fast, like when you first met me, totally out of my body, hadn't remembered the trauma yet, totally scared. when I think about that time, you know? That anxiety was actually a form of protection.