Gary Direnfeld
👤 SpeakerAppearances Over Time
Podcast Appearances
The parent has to go into empathy mode.
Sweetie, I see that didn't work for you.
Versus I told you so.
Like if you ever wag that finger, do you expect the teen to listen?
But if you go to empathy mode, you know, I'm sorry that this turned out for you.
What do we learn from this, sweetheart?
Is there any learning from this?
Is there anything that you would do differently on a go-forward basis?
Maybe they'll say yes.
Maybe they'll say no.
You're there to reinforce, hopefully, better judgment as they speak it to you.
This is the consultant role, no longer the boss.
Well, then you set up a dynamic between you and your kid where the kid is going to wrestle their independence from you.
And because they're angry, the angrier we are, the poorer our judgment.
So we have kids whose frontal lobes aren't yet developed.
They haven't mastered the sound judgment of adulthood, which, by the way, kicks in around age 25.
Because that is when insurance companies are