Gemma Speck

So a nice practice for this is, yes, call out the voice, give it a name, be like, you're a bully.

Miranda, you're a bully.

Brian.

But also, I know this may sound counterintuitive, thank the voice a little bit as well.

The reason that it came up, the reason that it's here, the reason that it started was because it thought it was helping you.

It thought that it was a way that it could prevent you from being judged or making mistakes.

If it was harsh on you first, then, you know, the world wasn't going to be harsh on you second or at all.

So thanking it, appreciating it, saying like, you've done your job.

Now it's my turn.

I can handle it from here.

Also as a way of relating to your voice is something that is, yeah, a bit of a bully, but also trying to do its best, meaning that you can kind of move past it, meaning that you can kind of put it to rest.

You don't need this coping mechanism anymore.

As we've said, you've got all the evidence you need now that it's not as helpful as you think, but also that you can be

wise, smart, humble, kind, all those things.

You can prevent yourself from embarrassing yourself through self-love rather than just self-hatred.

So we're going to take one more short break here before we get right back into it.

If you want to stop hating yourself or stop normalizing self-hatred, this may be the hardest thing in the episode to do, but you've got to stop hanging around people who think that putting you down is normal or who think that talking about how much they hate themselves is an appropriate conversation, especially when they almost like expect you to contribute.

We've spoken a lot about like what you need to do internally.

your external environment also matters.

Obviously, it's super normal to talk about our insecurities with our friends.