George Hahn

Recognizing the friction in our politics isn't an invitation to opt for the path of least resistance.

It teaches us that saving democracy requires the same things that build lasting relationships, showing up, enduring discomfort, and wielding the power we actually have rather than waiting for someone else to fix our problem.

Finally, action absorbs anxiety.

It feels good to do something with others, that whole community thing.

Or, put another way, stop doomscrolling, hectoring, complaining, and do something.

I hate the incel moniker.

Throughout 99% of history, 99% of men have been incels for long periods.

I was celibate until I was 19, not by choice.

I wanted a girlfriend in high school, but was largely sidelined from the dating game by afflictions common among teen boys.

I was painfully skinny and insecure, with bad skin.

So I got to work.

I enrolled at UCLA, hit the gym, focused on ways to demonstrate excellence, for me it was humor, built friendships with women, and surrounded myself with the impressive men of Zeta Beta Tau.

I worked hard and developed the calluses that nearly every successful person has.

I learned how to mourn and move on, to endure rejection.

By the middle of sophomore year, I had my first girlfriend.

There were a lot of firsts in the relationship, but two stand out.

Melanie was the first woman I was me around, instead of trying to be someone I thought she'd like.

And we loved each other.

Having an impressive person who could date other men choose and love you is profound.

Struggling to find a romantic partner is normal.