Grace Beverley

Yeah.

And same thing about, I guess, general confidence, because I think that it's, again, easy to see in hindsight how some people have built confidence, but actually like the practical steps to genuinely building confidence in a world where maybe you don't fit in the way that you thought you would, or you don't feel as happy about X, Y, Z. What would you say the biggest ways were that you like enabled your confidence to shift from that 30s to 20s?

Because I think that so many people probably...

listen and hold these views like I always have this massive cognitive dissonance between like hearing that and be like yeah and I don't care how I look and then I will feel shit about something or I won't like how a photo looks or I won't like how I look in something or whatever it might be and I'll be like ah you know it still gets to me and that's annoying because now I'm anti-feminist so like all of these different things so what would you say are the most practical steps you've taken to really increase that confidence or that difference between 30s and 20s

It is those like little practical things that like enable you to like really check yourself.

I do the exact same.

If I'm like scrolling past something and I think something nasty, I'm like, now say three nice things about that person.

And same if it's like my friends when they're like, you know, they say something horrible about themselves.

I'm like, okay, three nice things.

I think you'd be so surprised at how many people genuinely can't say three nice things about themselves at any one time.

And it's like, how can you go through life making the right decision for yourself if you genuinely think so lowly of yourself that you could not at any time when someone asks you, genuinely say three things that you like about yourself.

anything about yourself and I think that that's really like the crux of it as you say like I love what you say about hanging out with people that like you because I think that a lot of people would listen to this and be like oh okay yeah no that's one person who actually like does not make me feel good about myself because like I feel like I'm always on the back foot and it makes me feel uncool or like weird or like

too much this or too much that.

And I think like that is really the difference.

It's like surround yourself with people who think about you the way you want to think about yourself and then make that happen.

Like over and over and over again, teach yourself what you like about yourself.

do more work on myself I won't get it anymore but I also won't judge other people yeah surviving within the rules of the patriarchy but it's exactly this that also makes us like reject everything when you can't fit into the perfect box like as in you hear that all the time it's like oh I thought you were a feminist but you did this I thought you were this and you did this and it's like we are all going to be flawed and we are all going to have flawed approaches to things

Knowing how you feel and knowing that maybe there's a little bit of cognitive dissonance in the way that you, I don't know, as you've said, get Botox, do this, do that.

Like, yeah, fine.

Like those things can all coexist.