Greg Fitzsimmons

En tiedä, eivätkö he itse huoltaisivat minua. Näytän teille esimerkkinä.

You have to pick a sport in this town usually, like stand-up. I'm not a traditional stand-up or even known for being a stand-up. So when they start talking about who's the best or who's the funniest, they choose from a list of stand-ups oftentimes. Or film actors or who's the funniest actor or whatever. If you hop around as much as I hop around, you don't really get credit for the one thing.

Ei tarvitse tehdä jokaisen julkisen listan. Mikä on paras dokumentaari ja mikä on paras komediakysymys? Ymmärrän, että olen vähän kuin Claude. Tiedän tämän osan. Mutta mitä haluan kysyä on, että mitä te teette on melko yllättävää.

I'm blown away by myself. Yeah, I know, but why don't other people respect you for that? You cannot imagine how wrong you are. I don't... It was... Thank you. Is it Jane Goodall? Jane does not agree. No, somebody... Brian Callan, who I love, and you'll find out why after this, said like, look...

Olemme aina puhuneet, kuka on hauska ja mikä on hauska, mutta mitä Adam tekee on, että hän menee taustalla kerran ja seuraa sitä. Kuka tekee sitä ja miksi hän ei saa kriittistä siitä? Ja miksi siinä on kategoria siitä? Koska useimmat ihmiset, joita puhutaan, eivät voi tehdä sitä osaa. He tekevät tehtävää, mikä on hyvä, mutta se on hauskaa, että hauskalla tavalla...

We're doing a dive that has a higher difficulty level to stick, and we'll stick it most of the time, but we don't get points for the dive, which is a weird thing. But, you know, people also have a pretty limited time to think about things, you know. And so, you know, there's that. But also, look, it doesn't help that I make three films that are

very highly rated on Rotten Tomatoes, and none of them get into Sundance. Like, that is not helping. Like, when I sent Tom Arnold a, you know, he said, oh, I love the hammer, but I should check out the Paul Newman doc. And he was like, oh, my God, it's blown away. When's it coming out? And I said, it's out. It's been out for a year. Oh, how'd it do with Sundance? Like, it didn't get accepted. He's like, what? It didn't get accepted? It's like, oh, well, how come? It's like, because I'm not part of that group, and it does hurt. It's nice to have Sundance. Sundance.

Minä olen hyvin tuntunut asioista. Hyvä, että on yöpöytä asioista. Voit tehdä hyvää Huffington Postin kanssa. Ehkä se on se. Olen uskonut, että se auttaa. Olisikin vähän sitä. Miksi kaikki teidän Hollywood-ystävät haittavat Adamia? Ei, he eivät. Kaikki rakastavat Adamia. Se on hauska asia. En ymmärrä sitä, koska kaikki minun kirkkojeni haittavat Adamia. Niin kuin sama kappale. Se on osa kulttuurista.

He's a fringe player. He's the real star of the show.

Well, you know how you get a rawhide chew toy for your dog, kind of keep it busy? I kind of do that with my son with Maxipad. But he's a real good hard worker. He eats a lot. I'll tell you that much. He can eat. He really like a Rolls Royce. He eats the shrimp tails after my son is done with the tempura shrimp. He then eats the tails before it gets thrown away. We love a tail. How's his CV?

How is his civic? How is his civic duty? Oh, civic. I thought you said civic duty. No, no, no. Where would he do that? How is his civic duty? His civic, that's in the Smithsonian. He stepped up to a Prius. That's next to Archie's chair. Oh, that's great. Yeah, so it's been retired. Anyway, now where was I? So there I am. Does he still have a baby hair and he call it a beard?

Onko hänellä lapsi rauha? Ja kutsutaan hänelle rauhaa. Se on rauhaa. Se on rauhaa. Se on sellaista, mitä lapset ovat nukkeneet. Hän on ainoa syy, miksi me tiedämme sinut. Oho, Maxipata? Kyllä. Meillä ei ole mitään ideaa, kuka sinä olet, mutta hän on todella hauska. Minä olen hyvin arvostunut sinun yhteisössäsi. Oho, hyvin arvostunut. Hyvin arvostunut sinun yhteisössäsi. Minä olen yhteisössä. Minä olen yhteisössä.

Oh, they're sweet. Oh, we know. We watch.

You want a Facebook? Yeah, it's not, uh, yeah. Well, you know. We love Chris! Oh, no, no. We love Chris! No, you shouldn't, he's really not, he's really not that good. We love Chris! He's really more of just a placeholder until we, you know, get another guy in here. Boo! Oh, no, you turned out to suck your family. Boo! You suck, Adam! All right, real quick, and then we'll bring our guests in. John, 22, Grand Rapids, Michigan. John?

Oh, thank you. All the books are out if you want to go check those out. That was my favorite of the books. Was it? The stories and the timeline thing, you know, you structure these to a house. That was my favorite. A couple of bestsellers of nothing. I think so. I have no idea what stories from what book or whatever, but I do. It's mostly from your childhood and younger years. Picking the house and then having that be the next chapter as you move to the next house was a good idea. I'll take credit for it. John, thank you.

Olen aloittanut koulua täällä vuoden ajan, koulua. Olen tehnyt koulutuksen tänä kesänä koulutusyöntiössä. Hyvin työskennellyt työtä, työskennellyt kohtaan ja niin edelleen, mutta löysin, että kyseessä on paljon pysyvää taitoja, kuten puhutte, niin paljon suurimpia palkkoja MIP-taitoihin ja niin edelleen.

If I should pick something else to protest the unfairness. What's an MIP? Minor in possession. I mean, I have no idea. Wow, Brian. Wow. I have no idea. Is that right, John? Yeah, minor in possession. I feel like that stuff would drive... There's two things that would drive me nuts. It would drive me nuts on...

Johnny Law side with all the chicken shit handed out and then it would drive me nuts with the deadbeat dads who were putting cigarettes out on their kids and stuff like I couldn't even imagine. I think I would become depressed. I really do. I totally believe in

Ota töitä, jotka eivät ole haastavia. Jos et työskennellä ihmisiä, joita et työskennellä. Jos et työskennellä ihmisiä, joita et työskennellä, joita et työskennellä. Jos et työskennellä ihmisiä, joita et työskennellä.

If you're serious about like fighting the power, you know what I mean, with your career, I suggest maybe work there for a few years, get to know the system, get to know how it works, and then, you know, go the other way. Like, you know, prosecutor to defense attorney or something like that. Yes, I agree. All right. One last one, then we'll bring our guest in. Brett, 37, Salt Lake City. Brett. Hey, it's Gina, Bob, Joy. Mm-hmm. Oh, Jesus. Thank you. Hey. Adam. Mm-hmm.