Hannah Gadsby
speaker
778 appearances
2 recordings
1 series
first heard Feb 2025
last heard 10 Sep
Hannah Gadsby’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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recordings per month · last 12 monthsRecordings per month over the last 12 months — 1 in all, peaking in Sep 2026 with 1.
Appearances
Yeah, I'm like the Costco of human interaction. It's just like we're just buying bulk and just a certain line of products, just one of each. Um, and you, I don't, I've never actually been to Costco. That sounds like a nightmare to me. Is Costco even a thing? It's a nightmare. Yeah. Yeah. It's just, yeah. So it's a really bad metaphor for me because I hate big shopping places. Uh, yeah.
Anyway, so, but we'll keep going with it. So it's sort of, um, I've lost myself.
Yeah, I feel like I kind of get where he's coming from there. It's sort of like maybe he could have seen an advanced copy. Fair. This is like, you know, maybe a heads up.
Yeah, can I help you edit your bulk declaration of situation? Yeah. It is a tricky thing. Like I think you just have to work out, like with any relationship, I guess, you have to just meet people where they're at. When two neurodivergent people communicate, it's fluid. When two neurotypical people talk to each other, it's fluid. It's just when... the two meet, it can be really, really awkward.
And I've experienced that often. But the thing is, I have learned the ways of the neurotypicals. I have studied these people. Um, you know, like I, I prepare for, for neurotypical engagement. I know I, I'm trained in the art of small talk because I know it's important.
Uh, the problem is, is the privilege of neurotypical people is they don't have to learn how to parallel play with, you know, what happened is you're pathologized. It's like, you're not communicating correctly. Therefore you are less than you are not doing this right. You are weird, you know? Back in the day, they'd burn you at the stake, you know, like totally think I'm a witch.
Like I think that's what witches were, just neurodivergent women.
I think a really great place to start is not to take things personally and just move past it to the next thing. It's really difficult, I think, with the parent-child relationship because, you know, children don't have the language yet. They're learning the language in order to, you know, then communicate things.
uh, what, what issues are, what the problem are, you know, what might look like as, you know, a tantrum is probably a sensory overload and it looks like a small problem. Um, so, you know, a parent might go, well, you know, I, I'm taking you, I'm taking you seriously, but really that, you know, come on, this is, you know, like you don't like that cup, come on, clam down.
Um, but what's happening is perhaps there's something about the sensory part of this process that seems insignificant to a neurotypical but is, you know, a war zone for someone on the spectrum. There's an expected, you know, bond that's supposed to happen with parents and children that neurodivergent children are always going to disappoint.
And I think one of the first things is like, yeah, you've got to stop taking that seriously. I mean, you've got to take it seriously, sorry. Words are my gift. Personally, like try and sort of, meet people where they're at. And there's always going to be a lag with children because especially if you have difficulty with language, it's going to take a while to sort of get to that place.
But in the adult world, it is difficult for women on the spectrum. There is a certain place on the spectrum that is reserved for the great white geniuses, and they're allowed to hyper-focus on their special interests and be terrible at interpersonal communications, and they're held up as the best of men.
But it's much more difficult for women because of the expectations in the social network that we're supposed to uphold, and when we fail, that is a failure of character. Um, and it's, it's really difficult to sort of convince people that it's just like, I can't do it any differently. My brain is not wired to do what you want it to do. Now what?
But we sort of get stuck on this, like you're weird, you're doing this wrong, you know, and it's, I camouflage and mask a lot. Um, and that's an incredibly exhausting process. Um, So for this podcast, I had to prepare a lot. Like I had to listen to you. It wasn't a chore. Love your podcast. Well done. Keep up the good work.
But it was really active engagement with it because in order to talk to three people at the same time, I felt like I had to make sure I understood everything The way that you speak, the cadence, your pitch, not as a way of familiarizing myself.
So when in the moment, hoping that I could hear what you're saying, process it, and then turn it around with reciprocal speech takes a huge amount of effort for me. So what might look like, you know, it's just a casual chat is a marathon for me. And so then that depletes your energy levels. And then once you, you know, I have meltdowns, I shut down mostly. I just stop communicating.
And that's hard for people if they don't want to believe that it's not personal.
No problems.
No problems. No worries. There's a lot of worry, but no, we're cool.
Yeah. Before, there was a disconnect of, you know, when I mask, I'm fine. Like people are like, you're normal. You're a little bit quirky, but you're normal. But you can't maintain that. That's exhausting. And so once you're spending your private time with someone, I begin to melt down. So it will be real. reactive.
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