Hari Kondabolu

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All right.

Your first quote is from President Trump responding to a country saying it wanted to remain part of Denmark.

That's their problem.

Whose problem is it that they don't want to be invaded by the United States?

That would be Greenland.

This week, the administration met with the leaders of both Denmark and Greenland and told them, get ready to get liberated.

Trump has been obsessed with Greenland for a long time, and we know why.

They made Greenland one of the five words he had to remember on his cognitive test.

I don't think the president did either.

Now, people have speculated, and the White House, like, has not been able to deny this, that Trump wants Greenland so badly because it looks so much bigger on flat maps, right, than it actually is.

Their Mercator projection is if I needed to tell NPR people about that.

Yeah, right, right.

We should never, never have given him any of those map of the world placemats.

It's oil, right?

What is up there?

No, there's rare earth minerals.

Oh, okay, right.