James Cordova

And boy, what a step back.

Three years of stepping back to give ourselves space and to recapture all the energy that we were using to struggle with each other, to sort of nurture our own growth.

and then to come back together and find a way of being with each other that again, reminded ourselves of who we actually are outside of the struggle, what initially attracted us to each other and just all the other stuff that was here to be valued.

So that space, the stepping away from the struggle

is often necessary in order to free that energy to find a more collaborative and connected way forward.

They created that space and it actually led to growth and reconnection, which is wonderful.

So we can create that space sometimes on our own, inside the relationship, if we just step back from the struggle for a while and let something else grow in that space.

And sometimes it's hard to DIY it.

And we can benefit from bringing in a professional to help us discover how we're perpetuating the stuckness so that we can begin to loosen it.

Thank you for having me.

It's been a pleasure.

That's a great question.

So, yeah, I was raised in a community where one of the ways that we show respect

like love and affection for each other is just ongoing joshing and teasing of each other.

So this is just part of who I am in relationship.

And as it turns out, my wife is much too tenderhearted for that kind of ongoing teasing.

Oh, often.

Often.

Yeah.

No, this was something that, because it comes so naturally to me, it took years for me to really develop a sensitivity in that spot.