Jane

And so I think that combination probably led her to feel like, okay, I gotta, I gotta just completely focus on how to do this and do it well.

Okay.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And I'm wondering why, too.

Well, I guess if I can share, the first thought that I had was...

I don't know that I experience it so much as paranoia.

It's not like every time I have a thought that I hate pregnancy that I'm like, is it hurting my baby?

It's not quite like that.

It's more kind of, right now it feels like the accumulation of like, okay, I feel like I've spent six months kind of hating this every day.

And there are really moments where I'm like, okay, baby, like I feel you moving around, but that's kind of bugging me right now.

Like don't do that or whatever.

Yes.

It's like I have a stomach flu and you kicking in there is really making it worse.

Cut it out.

Awful.

Yeah, like and it's it's just awful and it's not their fault, but it's more like.

the thoughts that I have around this is how I take care of myself and my baby and the things that I should do in pregnancy and the expectations I maybe have of myself for fulfilling those things.

And then for a variety of reasons, not, you know, being able to fulfill them, whether it's because I have severe morning sickness or I'm have another illness or whatever it is, like there's been so many moments like that where I just,

Can't be present in my life in the way I want to be.