Janine Hilling
speaker
51 appearances
1 recordings
1 series
first heard Aug 2026
last heard 7 Aug
Janine Hilling’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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recordings per month · last 12 monthsRecordings per month over the last 12 months — 1 in all, peaking in Aug 2026 with 1.
Appearances
At 13, I was a small-town bogan with a bad attitude and an even worse haircut.
But the man of my dreams, he was everything I wasn't.
He was handsome, he was sophisticated, he was from the city.
He was also 23 years old and my teacher.
And look, nowadays when I think about Mr Chow, I realise he wasn't really all that.
Like, he was just an average looking guy who wore the same jumper to school every single day.
And it looked like it was made out of cat hair and tinsel, but back then, that wasn't the deal-breaker that it might be today.
At first, I watched Mr. Chow.
I loved Mr. Chow from afar.
His house was just behind ours, with just a vacant block in between, and so after school, when my parents were at work, I'd stand on the back veranda with a Winnie Red and a pair of binoculars that I borrowed off my mum's friend Sue.
and I'd watch him.
And sometimes I'd get my camera and put it in between like a really shit paparazzi and try and get candid shots of Mr. Chow taking his bins out.
And that was okay for a while.
But eventually I decided it was time to make my feelings known.
It was a risky move, but I knew just the person to help me with it.
My friend Joe had an extensive collection of Cosmopolitan magazines, and we were convinced these things would help us find a way for me to impress Mr Chow and make him want to be my boyfriend.
So we read these things cover to cover, and eventually we found an article called something like, 10 Easy Ways to Snare a Man, or something terrifying like Cosmo, like that.
And the way we went with was like a nightclub situation, where I could use these man-eating moves that I would learn from the accompanying article to seduce the object of my desire on the dance floor.
And this was perfect, because we had a school disco coming up the very next week.
So all week I practiced my moves, and I picked out the sexiest song I could think of.
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