Jay Shetty

You're gonna accept actions that you never would because that's where your decision's being made. Now that's logic. But the voice I'm being alone is not logical. The voice I'm scared of being alone is emotional.

You're gonna accept actions that you never would because that's where your decision's being made. Now that's logic. But the voice I'm being alone is not logical. The voice I'm scared of being alone is emotional.

I think so many people today who are desperate and scared of being single don't realize that that pain of being single is far less than the pain of being in a relationship and wanting a divorce or a breakup. When you're in that position, you can't get out of it. It's a lot harder than the pain of, will I find someone?

I think so many people today who are desperate and scared of being single don't realize that that pain of being single is far less than the pain of being in a relationship and wanting a divorce or a breakup. When you're in that position, you can't get out of it. It's a lot harder than the pain of, will I find someone?

If you've got the courage, and I really believe everyone gets to this point in their life, you have to sit with yourself and ask yourself, why? Why am I scared of being alone? Where did that come from? Is it because everyone in my family always told me that marriage was the pinnacle of life? Is it because all of my friends are getting engaged and proposed to?

If you've got the courage, and I really believe everyone gets to this point in their life, you have to sit with yourself and ask yourself, why? Why am I scared of being alone? Where did that come from? Is it because everyone in my family always told me that marriage was the pinnacle of life? Is it because all of my friends are getting engaged and proposed to?

Is it because I grew up in a big family and I like being surrounded by people? Is it because I don't have someone to go to movies with or I don't have someone to go out to brunch with on the weekend? What is it? And then what you do is for each need that you think a partner is gonna solve, you find another person in your life who can solve it.

Is it because I grew up in a big family and I like being surrounded by people? Is it because I don't have someone to go to movies with or I don't have someone to go out to brunch with on the weekend? What is it? And then what you do is for each need that you think a partner is gonna solve, you find another person in your life who can solve it.

So make a list, brunch, watching movies, going out, vulnerable talk, whatever it is that you think a partner is going to provide, go and find one friend that solves it. And all of a sudden your life starts to feel full. All of a sudden you're not alone anymore. because you've found friendship, you've found connection, now you're in a position of peace. I'll give an example actually, Lisa.

So make a list, brunch, watching movies, going out, vulnerable talk, whatever it is that you think a partner is going to provide, go and find one friend that solves it. And all of a sudden your life starts to feel full. All of a sudden you're not alone anymore. because you've found friendship, you've found connection, now you're in a position of peace. I'll give an example actually, Lisa.

So I became Match.com's relationship advisor a year ago. And the goal was I wanted to create a platform where I could create my philosophy but make it practical. Anyway, the reason I say that is we did an event for 100 singles in LA just two, three weeks ago. Everyone came with open minds, it was really interesting.

So I became Match.com's relationship advisor a year ago. And the goal was I wanted to create a platform where I could create my philosophy but make it practical. Anyway, the reason I say that is we did an event for 100 singles in LA just two, three weeks ago. Everyone came with open minds, it was really interesting.

But the reason I brought it up is I was talking to people about how we have two mindsets when it comes to dating and finding love. One is we have a passive mindset. Oh, it will happen when it happens. Oh, you know, I'm not really looking for it. It will just appear. And secretly, deep down, we're really scared and insecure. But we have this passive exterior.

But the reason I brought it up is I was talking to people about how we have two mindsets when it comes to dating and finding love. One is we have a passive mindset. Oh, it will happen when it happens. Oh, you know, I'm not really looking for it. It will just appear. And secretly, deep down, we're really scared and insecure. But we have this passive exterior.

Exactly. And then the second thing we have, I was telling this group, is that you have a pressure-filled mindset. So the pressure is, oh my God, everyone's got engaged. Oh my God, everyone's got married. Oh my God, everyone's having kids. Oh my God, everyone's dating. Oh my God, everyone's on vacation. So now it's like desperation. How will being passive or feeling pressure ever, ever attract love?

Exactly. And then the second thing we have, I was telling this group, is that you have a pressure-filled mindset. So the pressure is, oh my God, everyone's got engaged. Oh my God, everyone's got married. Oh my God, everyone's having kids. Oh my God, everyone's dating. Oh my God, everyone's on vacation. So now it's like desperation. How will being passive or feeling pressure ever, ever attract love?

Being passive doesn't attract love. Feeling pressure and desperation doesn't attract love. The state that attracts love is peace, or at least it attracts a peaceful love, which is what I think we all truly want. And so if you're passive, you'll attract a neglectful love. If you're desperate, you'll attract a weak love. But if you're peaceful, you attract a peaceful love.

Being passive doesn't attract love. Feeling pressure and desperation doesn't attract love. The state that attracts love is peace, or at least it attracts a peaceful love, which is what I think we all truly want. And so if you're passive, you'll attract a neglectful love. If you're desperate, you'll attract a weak love. But if you're peaceful, you attract a peaceful love.

And the reason I say this is if you were able to come up with all the reasons you don't want to be alone and find people to help with all of those feelings, you're now in a state of peace. That's why that's the answer that works.

And the reason I say this is if you were able to come up with all the reasons you don't want to be alone and find people to help with all of those feelings, you're now in a state of peace. That's why that's the answer that works.