Jay

Adrenaline level one.

I thought, shit, I'd better have a look.

I lifted the lid of the smoker and fucking kaboom!

The thing was on fire and lifting the lid fed a heap more oxygen that caused it to basically explode into a fireball.

Adrenaline level two.

With no fucking eyelashes or eyebrows or arm hair and smelling like a small bushfire, my immediate thought was, fuck, that's more than 500 bucks with a meat.

You have to save that.

The smoker is still in full fire, and as I had welding gloves nearby, I was able to grab the smoker trays full of meat and get them out.

Having taken the trays out, I could now see the problem.

For some unknown reason, the smoker was pumping pellets into the fire box, which had overflowed everywhere, and the whole bottom of the smoker was covered in pellets, which are now all on fire.

I've had that happen before to mine.

Adrenaline level three.

Fuck, fuck, fuckity, fuck, fuck.

I have to get this fire out.

Thankfully, I no longer smelt like a small bushfire and just slightly like roasted pork belly.

So needing to put the pellets out, I thought, why don't I just blow the little fuckers out?

Obviously, there's no way I could blow them out my mouth, but I would need a weed blower or a leaf blower.

Well, that worked as expected.

I hit the smoker with the weed blower, causing all the pellets to blow out of the smoker and land still on fire all over the ground around me.

This is such a cluster.