Jeff English

When you describe that scenario, it's like it was your fuel. I'm using the language of parts or guards. I call them guards, these protective parts, these protective adaptive behaviors. I've looked at many folks. In your example, it would be, thank God you've got ambition. Thank God you've got grit. Thank God you can get angry and you've got a voice.

When you describe that scenario, it's like it was your fuel. I'm using the language of parts or guards. I call them guards, these protective parts, these protective adaptive behaviors. I've looked at many folks. In your example, it would be, thank God you've got ambition. Thank God you've got grit. Thank God you can get angry and you've got a voice.

Like, I don't believe I would have met you if you didn't. And I'd say the same thing to somebody who was an alcoholic. Thank God you had that then. I don't think I would have met you should you not have had that. But now can we look at this thing and can we just at least look through the lens of, is it making life hard?

Like, I don't believe I would have met you if you didn't. And I'd say the same thing to somebody who was an alcoholic. Thank God you had that then. I don't think I would have met you should you not have had that. But now can we look at this thing and can we just at least look through the lens of, is it making life hard?

An important thing for folks to remember going into, am I going to do the work? Do I need to do the work? Am I working on a part of me? These guards, these protective parts of self, We are not necessarily trying to retire them. And that's what happens, I think, to a lot of folks. That part of them, there's almost a fear of like, how do I exist?

An important thing for folks to remember going into, am I going to do the work? Do I need to do the work? Am I working on a part of me? These guards, these protective parts of self, We are not necessarily trying to retire them. And that's what happens, I think, to a lot of folks. That part of them, there's almost a fear of like, how do I exist?

Does that mean that ambitious, at times perfectionist Peter has to go away? Think of folks who go through life out of their woundedness that we might describe as they're always waiting for the other shoe to drop. I mean, I can think of clients, multiple clients who have said it's not if it's going to drop, it's when and how loud.

Does that mean that ambitious, at times perfectionist Peter has to go away? Think of folks who go through life out of their woundedness that we might describe as they're always waiting for the other shoe to drop. I mean, I can think of clients, multiple clients who have said it's not if it's going to drop, it's when and how loud.

So they are really good, detailed at finding negativity, at finding danger. And they'd be a hell of a good person to have along on a walk in a bad side of town. I'm sure if they were a building inspector, they'd be the best damn one out there, okay? But can you not do that thing when you go home and sit on your couch? And back to the process and the vulnerability.

So they are really good, detailed at finding negativity, at finding danger. And they'd be a hell of a good person to have along on a walk in a bad side of town. I'm sure if they were a building inspector, they'd be the best damn one out there, okay? But can you not do that thing when you go home and sit on your couch? And back to the process and the vulnerability.

The vulnerability can get brought up so many different ways. We keep talking about this group process that you experience. There's so many different ways, but the common denominator is the vulnerability is what triggers this protective side, this protective behavior to step in.

The vulnerability can get brought up so many different ways. We keep talking about this group process that you experience. There's so many different ways, but the common denominator is the vulnerability is what triggers this protective side, this protective behavior to step in.

And when that happens, we can work on it in real time should that person be in at least consideration of doing something different. Every time I see you reading your journal, I think to myself, what must that be like?

And when that happens, we can work on it in real time should that person be in at least consideration of doing something different. Every time I see you reading your journal, I think to myself, what must that be like?

Just about 100% of the folks whose survival strategy is not substances, as far as that type of reaction. What am I going to do during the 12-step meeting? Well, you're going to hopefully sit there and get something out of it. You're just going to take alcohol and... Put in caretaking. Put in control. Fill in the blank with your word.

Just about 100% of the folks whose survival strategy is not substances, as far as that type of reaction. What am I going to do during the 12-step meeting? Well, you're going to hopefully sit there and get something out of it. You're just going to take alcohol and... Put in caretaking. Put in control. Fill in the blank with your word.

Helping folks wrap their brain around they're having an area of powerlessness. It's not always well-received at first. For example, let's say that a client's there because He's married. Let's say he's married to an addict. Okay. Wife's an addict. He's considering the same thing. She's the addict or whatever. And so within the spirit of sharing, maybe not in the group, maybe it was overheard.

Helping folks wrap their brain around they're having an area of powerlessness. It's not always well-received at first. For example, let's say that a client's there because He's married. Let's say he's married to an addict. Okay. Wife's an addict. He's considering the same thing. She's the addict or whatever. And so within the spirit of sharing, maybe not in the group, maybe it was overheard.

But anyway, the information comes out that this husband talking about his teenage daughter and going through the laundry found birth controls. So discovers that teenage daughter is on birth controls. And so the first words that come out of his mouth, What if the people at church find out?

But anyway, the information comes out that this husband talking about his teenage daughter and going through the laundry found birth controls. So discovers that teenage daughter is on birth controls. And so the first words that come out of his mouth, What if the people at church find out?