Jefferson Fisher

It's the understanding that it's not my job to feel somebody else's feelings for them.

That's what you do when you're afraid to disappoint someone.

You're afraid to say the hard thing, the right thing.

You'd rather be nice.

You'd rather say the thing that sounds good.

Those kind of things always have a bitter taste because you realize, I'm not being real.

I'm not being authentic.

And before you know it, you've just been people pleasing.

Before you know it, you feel less than yourself.

Before you know it, you feel lost and you really don't know who you are.

And now you're in your mid forties and you have a crisis and you go, what is my purpose on life here?

Because I've been living it to serve everybody else's needs, not for what's true and authentic in my life.

Number one, it's a valid fear.

I'm not going to say that that fear isn't valid.

I think anybody here that go, well, that's really understandable.

What if they don't?

It's always the, what if they do?

Well, okay, let's assume that they do.

What happens next?

If they do, you push them away.