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Jefferson Fisher

👤 Person
6001 total appearances

Appearances Over Time

Podcast Appearances

The Jefferson Fisher Podcast
Outsmarting Narcissists: The Praise or Provoke Trap

Number three. I want you to have this mindset of limited time, limited interaction. This is not the time when you're talking with these kind of people to sit down with your hot tea and say, let's talk it out. I need to express to you all the things that have been boiling up inside me, and I need to empty out my bag with you and help talk about this kind of stuff. Nope, they're not going to do it.

The Jefferson Fisher Podcast
Outsmarting Narcissists: The Praise or Provoke Trap

They can't. They can't. Understand, they cannot. So when you get in those situations, keep it very limited. Even if it's a time frame, keep the conversations as short as can be. When they start to lash out in different ways, go to your neutral statements, remember the game, and keep it very short. When you try to have a very quick clap back or a comeback, it's not going to work.

The Jefferson Fisher Podcast
Outsmarting Narcissists: The Praise or Provoke Trap

They can't. They can't. Understand, they cannot. So when you get in those situations, keep it very limited. Even if it's a time frame, keep the conversations as short as can be. When they start to lash out in different ways, go to your neutral statements, remember the game, and keep it very short. When you try to have a very quick clap back or a comeback, it's not going to work.

The Jefferson Fisher Podcast
Outsmarting Narcissists: The Praise or Provoke Trap

They can't. They can't. Understand, they cannot. So when you get in those situations, keep it very limited. Even if it's a time frame, keep the conversations as short as can be. When they start to lash out in different ways, go to your neutral statements, remember the game, and keep it very short. When you try to have a very quick clap back or a comeback, it's not going to work.

The Jefferson Fisher Podcast
Outsmarting Narcissists: The Praise or Provoke Trap

It's never going to have the effect that you want it to have. They don't do that kind of stuff. I'm going to tell you right now a tip. that I've used a lot with these type of behaviors in cross-examination. Again, you take it however you want to take it. I can promise you it works. People who exhibit narcissistic behaviors don't care about you. They care about everybody else.

The Jefferson Fisher Podcast
Outsmarting Narcissists: The Praise or Provoke Trap

It's never going to have the effect that you want it to have. They don't do that kind of stuff. I'm going to tell you right now a tip. that I've used a lot with these type of behaviors in cross-examination. Again, you take it however you want to take it. I can promise you it works. People who exhibit narcissistic behaviors don't care about you. They care about everybody else.

The Jefferson Fisher Podcast
Outsmarting Narcissists: The Praise or Provoke Trap

It's never going to have the effect that you want it to have. They don't do that kind of stuff. I'm going to tell you right now a tip. that I've used a lot with these type of behaviors in cross-examination. Again, you take it however you want to take it. I can promise you it works. People who exhibit narcissistic behaviors don't care about you. They care about everybody else.

The Jefferson Fisher Podcast
Outsmarting Narcissists: The Praise or Provoke Trap

Everybody else who they believe is watching them. They don't care about you. They care about the audience, the crowd. This is their stage, after all. Didn't you know? This is their platform. Everybody loves them. Everybody watches them. Their audience, my people. That's what they see in their world. That's why they can't admit when they're wrong. It would hurt the ratings.

The Jefferson Fisher Podcast
Outsmarting Narcissists: The Praise or Provoke Trap

Everybody else who they believe is watching them. They don't care about you. They care about the audience, the crowd. This is their stage, after all. Didn't you know? This is their platform. Everybody loves them. Everybody watches them. Their audience, my people. That's what they see in their world. That's why they can't admit when they're wrong. It would hurt the ratings.

The Jefferson Fisher Podcast
Outsmarting Narcissists: The Praise or Provoke Trap

Everybody else who they believe is watching them. They don't care about you. They care about the audience, the crowd. This is their stage, after all. Didn't you know? This is their platform. Everybody loves them. Everybody watches them. Their audience, my people. That's what they see in their world. That's why they can't admit when they're wrong. It would hurt the ratings.

The Jefferson Fisher Podcast
Outsmarting Narcissists: The Praise or Provoke Trap

It would hurt the views, right? So how do you use that to your advantage? Let me tell you a story. I was taking a deposition of an expert. That's the type of people I usually cross-examine. They show narcissistic tendencies. Experts. And it's not because they are an expert. That's not the bad pattern. Not at all. There's some wonderful people that are experts of their field.

The Jefferson Fisher Podcast
Outsmarting Narcissists: The Praise or Provoke Trap

It would hurt the views, right? So how do you use that to your advantage? Let me tell you a story. I was taking a deposition of an expert. That's the type of people I usually cross-examine. They show narcissistic tendencies. Experts. And it's not because they are an expert. That's not the bad pattern. Not at all. There's some wonderful people that are experts of their field.

The Jefferson Fisher Podcast
Outsmarting Narcissists: The Praise or Provoke Trap

It would hurt the views, right? So how do you use that to your advantage? Let me tell you a story. I was taking a deposition of an expert. That's the type of people I usually cross-examine. They show narcissistic tendencies. Experts. And it's not because they are an expert. That's not the bad pattern. Not at all. There's some wonderful people that are experts of their field.

The Jefferson Fisher Podcast
Outsmarting Narcissists: The Praise or Provoke Trap

I'm talking the type that drink their own Kool-Aid so much that that, I mean, they just, they get drunk off of it. The people who just get intoxicated by the sound of their own voice. Now they will. It's often a very highly specialized topic. Maybe it's a biomechanical engineer. Maybe it's a very highly qualified accident reconstructionist or some specific niche down toxicologist.

The Jefferson Fisher Podcast
Outsmarting Narcissists: The Praise or Provoke Trap

I'm talking the type that drink their own Kool-Aid so much that that, I mean, they just, they get drunk off of it. The people who just get intoxicated by the sound of their own voice. Now they will. It's often a very highly specialized topic. Maybe it's a biomechanical engineer. Maybe it's a very highly qualified accident reconstructionist or some specific niche down toxicologist.

The Jefferson Fisher Podcast
Outsmarting Narcissists: The Praise or Provoke Trap

I'm talking the type that drink their own Kool-Aid so much that that, I mean, they just, they get drunk off of it. The people who just get intoxicated by the sound of their own voice. Now they will. It's often a very highly specialized topic. Maybe it's a biomechanical engineer. Maybe it's a very highly qualified accident reconstructionist or some specific niche down toxicologist.

The Jefferson Fisher Podcast
Outsmarting Narcissists: The Praise or Provoke Trap

Something that's very, very, very high end. We need these type of opinions in cases. Real quick, in certain, well, for sure in Texas and for sure in the U.S., You can't I can't just go on the stand or you can't just go on the stand and say, oh, yes, I'm going to give an opinion about a toxicology report or something of I just tasted this water and it has X amount of sodium in it.

The Jefferson Fisher Podcast
Outsmarting Narcissists: The Praise or Provoke Trap

Something that's very, very, very high end. We need these type of opinions in cases. Real quick, in certain, well, for sure in Texas and for sure in the U.S., You can't I can't just go on the stand or you can't just go on the stand and say, oh, yes, I'm going to give an opinion about a toxicology report or something of I just tasted this water and it has X amount of sodium in it.

The Jefferson Fisher Podcast
Outsmarting Narcissists: The Praise or Provoke Trap

Something that's very, very, very high end. We need these type of opinions in cases. Real quick, in certain, well, for sure in Texas and for sure in the U.S., You can't I can't just go on the stand or you can't just go on the stand and say, oh, yes, I'm going to give an opinion about a toxicology report or something of I just tasted this water and it has X amount of sodium in it.

The Jefferson Fisher Podcast
Outsmarting Narcissists: The Praise or Provoke Trap

You can't just say that if you don't have the credentials to back it up. Anybody who's an attorney, you know rule 702, you have to show that you have qualified knowledge, skills, training to be able to make these kinds of opinions. Well, these experts know that and typically if they've been in the field a very long time, they have a very high opinion of themselves.