Jefferson Fisher

Those words, those absolutes, they create a lot of friction in the conversation because the conversation is no longer about the issue.

It is now about the accuracy.

It's no longer about the thing you were first originally talking about, what's beneath it all.

Instead, it's now about the accuracy of somebody's statement.

That's what happens to your brain when the other person's side, when you use the absolutes, what happens to the other person is they start to go, that's not accurate.

That's not accurate.

I don't always do that.

I don't never do this.

and they start to try and pick and poke and look at the accuracy.

Okay, well, let's look at the timeline.

When's the last time that I said that?

Or when's the last time I did that?

And it becomes a timeline game.

It becomes who's more accurate, whose memory is better, who is the kind of the referee of the argument.

And accuracy calls, when somebody blows the whistle on accuracy, you say, that's not accurate.

I don't always do that.

I don't never do that.

it's now a second argument.

So if you have straight line of A to B and you and I are talking and I just use the word never, you never, you know what happens?

We split, right?