Jessi Draper

I was so beaten down emotionally and I was just so unhappy, deeply unhappy in what I was in.

But I felt trapped like not only with like my money and my business like you saw in season four, but also just.

he made me feel like I couldn't leave.

And so, and for my kids too.

So I was just really, really upset.

And I met Marciano and it was the first person who was like nice to me and told me I was cool and pretty and fun and like that I was worth something.

And I just remember being like, oh, like this is how a man should talk to you.

And not that it's okay what I did by any means, but I do feel like I was like, I'm gonna, I remember thinking like, if I do this tonight,

just kissing him, by the way, it will give me a reason to be done.

It'll give Jordan a reason to leave me.

I can be free.

Yes.

Even if it was me that did the bad thing, I was like, maybe this could end it.

I was so scared.

And that's how I felt the last year, to be honest.

But I was scared of being alone.

I was scared of hurting him.

I was scared of the unknown and the kids.

I've been divorced before and it sucked.

And this time I have kids.