Jillian Turecki

The more you are going to be challenged to overcome and transcend old things and old patterning to actually love someone and to do love, where it's a verb and not just a feeling. So how do we slow it down and we just want to rush it? It's about acknowledging that feeling. So a lot of people they meet, there's chemistry. And I know that this was me. I think if there's chemistry, then this is it.

As opposed to, well, maybe in the past there's been chemistry and I haven't had chemistry with the right people. So maybe I need to slow down a little bit and sort of process my enthusiasm. And it's not about, I don't want anyone to, I don't want to rain on anyone's parade. Like all that stuff is really fun in the beginning. But you want to just say, okay, hold on. What am I feeling right now?

As opposed to, well, maybe in the past there's been chemistry and I haven't had chemistry with the right people. So maybe I need to slow down a little bit and sort of process my enthusiasm. And it's not about, I don't want anyone to, I don't want to rain on anyone's parade. Like all that stuff is really fun in the beginning. But you want to just say, okay, hold on. What am I feeling right now?

This feels really good. This is really exciting. But I need to slow down because I actually need to uncover this person's character. I need to uncover their values. I perhaps need to get a little bit clearer on what it is that I need, what it is that I value, and what it is that I really, really want. Not just my preference, but what do I need in order to function in a relationship?

This feels really good. This is really exciting. But I need to slow down because I actually need to uncover this person's character. I need to uncover their values. I perhaps need to get a little bit clearer on what it is that I need, what it is that I value, and what it is that I really, really want. Not just my preference, but what do I need in order to function in a relationship?

Do I have some understanding of myself? You know, it's difficult. Women, childbearing age, societal pressures, get married. I understand I have nothing but compassion for that. The more that I can stress that who you decide to partner with is one of the most important decisions you will ever make in your entire life. And we are meant to kind of get it wrong.

Do I have some understanding of myself? You know, it's difficult. Women, childbearing age, societal pressures, get married. I understand I have nothing but compassion for that. The more that I can stress that who you decide to partner with is one of the most important decisions you will ever make in your entire life. And we are meant to kind of get it wrong.

And some of us get it wrong for a longer time than others, right? But it is the most important decision. So if you're going to rush that, you're really truly doing yourself a disservice. And you have to get comfortable with the fact that, yes, you're scared. You're scared to be alone. You're scared to not be loved. You don't want to be in the dating world. I get all of that. Be mindful of it.

And some of us get it wrong for a longer time than others, right? But it is the most important decision. So if you're going to rush that, you're really truly doing yourself a disservice. And you have to get comfortable with the fact that, yes, you're scared. You're scared to be alone. You're scared to not be loved. You don't want to be in the dating world. I get all of that. Be mindful of it.

Connect to that within yourself and remind yourself always that who you decide to spend your life with might be one of the most important decisions, if not the most important decision, because there's no one in your life who's going to have a bigger impact on your overall well-being and emotional state than the person who you choose to spend your life with.

Connect to that within yourself and remind yourself always that who you decide to spend your life with might be one of the most important decisions, if not the most important decision, because there's no one in your life who's going to have a bigger impact on your overall well-being and emotional state than the person who you choose to spend your life with.

So you've got to take that decision very seriously and not rush it.

So you've got to take that decision very seriously and not rush it.

Agree 100%. Agree 100%. It's so hard when you're dating someone

Agree 100%. Agree 100%. It's so hard when you're dating someone

Yes. And many of those people might think, yes, it's easier when I'm single, but they're actually afraid to go back to it. And that's why they stay in these relationships because we fear the unknown.

Yes. And many of those people might think, yes, it's easier when I'm single, but they're actually afraid to go back to it. And that's why they stay in these relationships because we fear the unknown.

I'm going to give you some theories. And there are theories shared by many. But one thing that I say is that if anyone truly understood 100% the answer to that, they would win the Nobel Peace Prize. Right? Because everyone has these theories and they're good theories and they're rooted in psychology.

I'm going to give you some theories. And there are theories shared by many. But one thing that I say is that if anyone truly understood 100% the answer to that, they would win the Nobel Peace Prize. Right? Because everyone has these theories and they're good theories and they're rooted in psychology.

I really want to put out there that no one truly has the answer to that, but there's some really good theories. So one theory, when someone is not paying as much attention to us, that could trigger attraction. And one of the reasons is, well, maybe they are like, maybe there's something really special about them.