Jillian Turecki

And I said to her, and she wanted me to be really brutally honest with her. I said, first of all, that's actually not true. Sure, it's true for some, but it's actually not true. There are actually men out there who will be very attracted to you in a way that they want to know more about you. Like they're drawn to you. They're magnetized to you.

Yes, it's attraction in the beginning, it's lust, but they want to know you. And they want a relationship. There's millions of men, single men, who want love and want a relationship. But you're choosing the ones who kind of suck. And who just want that from you. And you are actually rewarding their behavior by giving them another date. So you're part of the problem.

Yes, it's attraction in the beginning, it's lust, but they want to know you. And they want a relationship. There's millions of men, single men, who want love and want a relationship. But you're choosing the ones who kind of suck. And who just want that from you. And you are actually rewarding their behavior by giving them another date. So you're part of the problem.

These men are getting rewarded because they're getting some smart, intelligent, beautiful woman. They're getting a second date after they are treating you like they could care less about you. So you are actually training these men to do more of what they already do.

These men are getting rewarded because they're getting some smart, intelligent, beautiful woman. They're getting a second date after they are treating you like they could care less about you. So you are actually training these men to do more of what they already do.

Instead of being like, yeah, I'm not interested and absolutely never seeing them again and deciding to be a little bit higher with your standard and a little bit stricter with your sort of boundaries about who you decide to date. I think that's actually a really good example of how someone can get really fixated on a belief and your beliefs are what create your mindset. Mm-hmm.

Instead of being like, yeah, I'm not interested and absolutely never seeing them again and deciding to be a little bit higher with your standard and a little bit stricter with your sort of boundaries about who you decide to date. I think that's actually a really good example of how someone can get really fixated on a belief and your beliefs are what create your mindset. Mm-hmm.

Then your reality becomes a reflection of your belief system. And yet you don't even realize the things that you're doing to reinforce it. Hence, it begins with you. And so having this conversation and also having like a really good looking podcast. heart nerd man at the table.

Then your reality becomes a reflection of your belief system. And yet you don't even realize the things that you're doing to reinforce it. Hence, it begins with you. And so having this conversation and also having like a really good looking podcast. heart nerd man at the table.

When I say good looking, I mean, on the inside, on the outside, like, you know, great catch saying, absolutely, that's not true. And then me pointing out her sort of pattern and all that, we were able to kind of chip away at a belief that was actually the belief that's keeping her single.

When I say good looking, I mean, on the inside, on the outside, like, you know, great catch saying, absolutely, that's not true. And then me pointing out her sort of pattern and all that, we were able to kind of chip away at a belief that was actually the belief that's keeping her single.

It's a combination of things of challenging yourself. Like, is that really true? Where did I adopt that? How am I reinforcing that? Could it be true that I've had some, a couple of bad experiences, but sometimes that's the way the cookie crumbles. And that doesn't necessarily mean that it's everyone.

It's a combination of things of challenging yourself. Like, is that really true? Where did I adopt that? How am I reinforcing that? Could it be true that I've had some, a couple of bad experiences, but sometimes that's the way the cookie crumbles. And that doesn't necessarily mean that it's everyone.

So you keep going for maybe the guy who you think is really smart, looks a certain way, has a certain job, or she looks a certain way or whatever. And you're so attached to that, that you keep getting the same thing as opposed to the mindset shift has to be, yes, listen, chemistry is important. You got to be attracted to the person if you want to sleep with them.

So you keep going for maybe the guy who you think is really smart, looks a certain way, has a certain job, or she looks a certain way or whatever. And you're so attached to that, that you keep getting the same thing as opposed to the mindset shift has to be, yes, listen, chemistry is important. You got to be attracted to the person if you want to sleep with them.

But you want to also train yourself to be drawn to certain qualities like someone's character and give people who you are like, well, oh, you know, there's something kind of interesting about them. I don't know if I feel an immediate spark. Screw the immediate spark. Let's see if you're actually like who you are and when you're with this person. And I'm not saying endless amount of time.

But you want to also train yourself to be drawn to certain qualities like someone's character and give people who you are like, well, oh, you know, there's something kind of interesting about them. I don't know if I feel an immediate spark. Screw the immediate spark. Let's see if you're actually like who you are and when you're with this person. And I'm not saying endless amount of time.

You can't force chemistry, but it can sometimes turn on like a light switch after three or four dates. If when you get home from the date, you're like, I had a good time, but I'm not quite sure if I feel the spark. They're not really my type and that whole chatter.

You can't force chemistry, but it can sometimes turn on like a light switch after three or four dates. If when you get home from the date, you're like, I had a good time, but I'm not quite sure if I feel the spark. They're not really my type and that whole chatter.

Yes.