Joe Hudson

That was what was going on.

And so because I had learned that, I proved it to myself all the time.

I was constantly telling myself I should do these things that I wasn't doing.

I had all sorts of bad habits.

You know, definitely was avoiding life through alcohol, marijuana.

I wrestled with for a while.

All just as some way to get away from myself because these emotions were coming

Um, and luckily and unluckily at the same time, I had this experience where I was seven years old, where I was crying and my parents hated when I cried, which is not uncommon, you know?

And so they would throw pity parties for me.

And, uh,

And so they one day took pictures of me to make fun of me, and they actually put them in the photo album.

And so when I was, I don't know, 21 or 22 years old, I came across that photo, and I was like, oh, that's probably why I haven't cried in like 14 years.

Like that's probably it.

And I need to learn how to cry.

I do not know why that gift came, but I just knew that that was something I had to do.

And so I started trying to cry and I couldn't do it.

Like I literally spent years trying to cry and couldn't do it.

At this time, I'm meeting my wife.

My wife has... My wife is responsible for a lot.

She's amazing.