Joe Navarro

And it's the primary means by which we show empathy.

It's the action. It's doing something, as I talk in the book, be exceptional. Do something that is pro-social or beneficial, but don't wait. Right. The worst thing we can do, if you want to let people know that you don't care, take your time. And this happens all the time. You go to a counter, you walk up to a counter and say, hey, you know, I'd love some help with this.

It's the action. It's doing something, as I talk in the book, be exceptional. Do something that is pro-social or beneficial, but don't wait. Right. The worst thing we can do, if you want to let people know that you don't care, take your time. And this happens all the time. You go to a counter, you walk up to a counter and say, hey, you know, I'd love some help with this.

You know, and then they just, well, I don't know. Let me check in the back. And they take their time walking to the back and then they take time walking back. You might as well be shouting, I don't care. What I tell managers is, that's your responsibility. Why did you hire someone who can't move at the speed of light? Because movement is equated with caring.

You know, and then they just, well, I don't know. Let me check in the back. And they take their time walking to the back and then they take time walking back. You might as well be shouting, I don't care. What I tell managers is, that's your responsibility. Why did you hire someone who can't move at the speed of light? Because movement is equated with caring.

So if that's their attitude, you might as well have a sign that says, I don't care. Now, you could say, well, you know, maybe they have a mobility problem. Fine. Fronted. I'd say, you know what? It's going to take me a minute because I just had my hip replaced, but I'm going to address it right now. We can forgive. But when we don't show we care by action, that is so immediate.

So if that's their attitude, you might as well have a sign that says, I don't care. Now, you could say, well, you know, maybe they have a mobility problem. Fine. Fronted. I'd say, you know what? It's going to take me a minute because I just had my hip replaced, but I'm going to address it right now. We can forgive. But when we don't show we care by action, that is so immediate.

Absolutely. What's interesting about humans in the years that I've studied them is that humans don't seek perfection. The baby doesn't care if it's sucking its own thumb or the twin sister's thumb. They're interchangeable. Humans don't seek perfection. What we seek is psychological comfort. And whoever provides that is the soonest winner. It is as simple as that. If you can, you're too young.

Absolutely. What's interesting about humans in the years that I've studied them is that humans don't seek perfection. The baby doesn't care if it's sucking its own thumb or the twin sister's thumb. They're interchangeable. Humans don't seek perfection. What we seek is psychological comfort. And whoever provides that is the soonest winner. It is as simple as that. If you can, you're too young.

But I remember when computers came out, And they were in ugly boxes, and they were in ugly stores, and they were behind the counter, and they were ugly. Steve Jobs comes around and says, no, we're going to put them on these lab tables like we have, and we're going to make them accessible. So this mysterious device that is such an ugly word that you forget that people hated computers so much.

But I remember when computers came out, And they were in ugly boxes, and they were in ugly stores, and they were behind the counter, and they were ugly. Steve Jobs comes around and says, no, we're going to put them on these lab tables like we have, and we're going to make them accessible. So this mysterious device that is such an ugly word that you forget that people hated computers so much.

They used to come in at night and cut the cords. That's how scared people were of computing. And he went from 4% shares of the computer market to whatever it is now, 67 or whatever the number is. Why? Psychological comfort. And I tell this to businessmen. When you're negotiating, what you're negotiating for is can you create enough psychological comfort that the other person can live with that.

They used to come in at night and cut the cords. That's how scared people were of computing. And he went from 4% shares of the computer market to whatever it is now, 67 or whatever the number is. Why? Psychological comfort. And I tell this to businessmen. When you're negotiating, what you're negotiating for is can you create enough psychological comfort that the other person can live with that.

So that I can feel, okay, maybe I didn't get everything I wanted, but for this period in time, I can live with that psychological comfort. I can go back to the board and report that this was the best that I can do and so forth. Aim for psychological comfort.

So that I can feel, okay, maybe I didn't get everything I wanted, but for this period in time, I can live with that psychological comfort. I can go back to the board and report that this was the best that I can do and so forth. Aim for psychological comfort.

You started it today. You welcomed me in and then you said, what would you like to drink? Would you like some water? Would you like some tea? Would you like some coffee? That begins the process of psychological comfort. We're in a quiet environment. Less noise, more psychological comfort. Less lighting. It doesn't hurt the eyes.

You started it today. You welcomed me in and then you said, what would you like to drink? Would you like some water? Would you like some tea? Would you like some coffee? That begins the process of psychological comfort. We're in a quiet environment. Less noise, more psychological comfort. Less lighting. It doesn't hurt the eyes.

Anything that starts at a biological, physical, physiological, and then cognitive level. So psychological comfort. We're negotiating. So you want to offer $3,000. I think I'm worth $6,000. So how do we achieve that? Well, I'm going to let you tell me your side of why you can only provide 3,000, and I'm going to provide you my side, okay?

Anything that starts at a biological, physical, physiological, and then cognitive level. So psychological comfort. We're negotiating. So you want to offer $3,000. I think I'm worth $6,000. So how do we achieve that? Well, I'm going to let you tell me your side of why you can only provide 3,000, and I'm going to provide you my side, okay?

The fact that we actually get to tell our story begins the process of psychological comfort. Now, in the end, I may have to abide by that because there's only so much money. And if it's not in the budget, it's not in the budget. But there may be some things that you can add to say, look, this is all we have at this time. But we're going to reevaluate this in three months.