Joe Navarro

And to the point where you can actually work with individuals to calm them down or to see things your way or to appreciate, let's say in negotiations, to begin to be more receptive. People are more receptive if they can mirror your behaviors.

And to the point where you can actually work with individuals to calm them down or to see things your way or to appreciate, let's say in negotiations, to begin to be more receptive. People are more receptive if they can mirror your behaviors.

In general, we cannot be mimicking each other like it's a game. It becomes ridiculous. But there's no way we can negotiate if you're screaming and I'm stoic. Yeah. It just doesn't happen. For instance, you and I probably are doing a pretty good job of just mirroring each other in the conversation.

In general, we cannot be mimicking each other like it's a game. It becomes ridiculous. But there's no way we can negotiate if you're screaming and I'm stoic. Yeah. It just doesn't happen. For instance, you and I probably are doing a pretty good job of just mirroring each other in the conversation.

We are more likely to be successful, have more face time, and achieve more if we can talk to each other this way. than if all of a sudden I decide to sit sideways, kick my feet up, and lean on my elbow. That gesture alone, even though it's a comfort display, doesn't put us in synchrony.

We are more likely to be successful, have more face time, and achieve more if we can talk to each other this way. than if all of a sudden I decide to sit sideways, kick my feet up, and lean on my elbow. That gesture alone, even though it's a comfort display, doesn't put us in synchrony.

And everything that I have ever found was, even when I was talking to terrorists, even when talking to terrorists who absolutely hated me, hated a lot of other things, If I could just get them grounded to the point where we are talking basically the same way and using the same words. If they say, my family, don't say wife and kids. use family, don't use terms of art.

And everything that I have ever found was, even when I was talking to terrorists, even when talking to terrorists who absolutely hated me, hated a lot of other things, If I could just get them grounded to the point where we are talking basically the same way and using the same words. If they say, my family, don't say wife and kids. use family, don't use terms of art.

If they say, well, what's the price? Don't come back and say, well, the points on this, that's not what they asked. That's a great way to demonstrate that you're not listening. And the other thing I always emphasize is that for years, people said, well, try to reduce everything that's emotional. so that it doesn't interfere, that's not how we evolved. That is absolutely not how we evolved.

If they say, well, what's the price? Don't come back and say, well, the points on this, that's not what they asked. That's a great way to demonstrate that you're not listening. And the other thing I always emphasize is that for years, people said, well, try to reduce everything that's emotional. so that it doesn't interfere, that's not how we evolved. That is absolutely not how we evolved.

We evolved to deal with emotions because emotions keep us alive. When our amygdala senses a threat, it is there to deal with that. And anything negative rises to prominence. That's one of the first things I teach. If it's really negative, it rises to prominence. We assess for it first. We deal with that first. And often in business, what we see is somebody had a hard time finding your location.

We evolved to deal with emotions because emotions keep us alive. When our amygdala senses a threat, it is there to deal with that. And anything negative rises to prominence. That's one of the first things I teach. If it's really negative, it rises to prominence. We assess for it first. We deal with that first. And often in business, what we see is somebody had a hard time finding your location.

They had a hard time parking. Then they had to go to your receptionist who was on the phone and took about seven minutes to even say good morning. And when they did, they did it with no alacrity. Then they have to go through security. Then they have to take the elevator that's crowded and then finally get to your office.

They had a hard time parking. Then they had to go to your receptionist who was on the phone and took about seven minutes to even say good morning. And when they did, they did it with no alacrity. Then they have to go through security. Then they have to take the elevator that's crowded and then finally get to your office.

And you want them to jump right into the meeting without all that negativity that has been accrued. That's not how humans evolved. That is absolutely not how our species evolved. Our species evolved to de-conflict that, to diminish that by first dealing with that. That's where storytelling in part came from, where we came and said, you know, I chased it.

And you want them to jump right into the meeting without all that negativity that has been accrued. That's not how humans evolved. That is absolutely not how our species evolved. Our species evolved to de-conflict that, to diminish that by first dealing with that. That's where storytelling in part came from, where we came and said, you know, I chased it.

I was able to attack me, then I attacked back at it, you know, and then we We go through that whole storytelling, which has mythical proportions and mythical aspects as archetypes. And if you subscribe to Jungian psychology. One of the arguments that I always use is this. How many of you have been in an argument, and then 30 minutes later, you remember all the clever lines you should have said?

I was able to attack me, then I attacked back at it, you know, and then we We go through that whole storytelling, which has mythical proportions and mythical aspects as archetypes. And if you subscribe to Jungian psychology. One of the arguments that I always use is this. How many of you have been in an argument, and then 30 minutes later, you remember all the clever lines you should have said?

We all have. And that's because the emotional brain hijacks neural activity. If you want the best out of people, if you want the best out of a relationship, vent that. Get that out. Give it time. Okay. And yes, you're going to have to invest that time and then move forward so that you can deal with the transactional, the business and so forth. Okay.

We all have. And that's because the emotional brain hijacks neural activity. If you want the best out of people, if you want the best out of a relationship, vent that. Get that out. Give it time. Okay. And yes, you're going to have to invest that time and then move forward so that you can deal with the transactional, the business and so forth. Okay.