Joey Diaz

Yeah. I got to clean up. I had a call with Leanne. I was hammered last night. I was hammered. I was telling Pete. I couldn't understand how it did, and I figured it out. A girl at the bar, hot as shit, very sweet, Costa Rican chick, I guess walked me to my room, and I was like, hey, man, I'm married. She's just a good Samaritan. I was so drunk, I couldn't find my key.

I didn't know what room I was in, and she was like, I'm going to get you to bed. And I woke up thinking she wanted to fuck me. Yeah. She just got me to my bed. I told her at the door. I was like, it's not going to happen. And she's like, yeah, I know. But I talked to Leah this morning. She's like, yo, when you come home, you need to dry out. This press run's been rough on me.

I didn't know what room I was in, and she was like, I'm going to get you to bed. And I woke up thinking she wanted to fuck me. Yeah. She just got me to my bed. I told her at the door. I was like, it's not going to happen. And she's like, yeah, I know. But I talked to Leah this morning. She's like, yo, when you come home, you need to dry out. This press run's been rough on me.

I didn't know what room I was in, and she was like, I'm going to get you to bed. And I woke up thinking she wanted to fuck me. Yeah. She just got me to my bed. I told her at the door. I was like, it's not going to happen. And she's like, yeah, I know. But I talked to Leah this morning. She's like, yo, when you come home, you need to dry out. This press run's been rough on me.

How long has this run been? Two weeks straight. But... It's been, you know, I still do phoners to radio stations, so I've been getting up at 6 in the morning, 4 in the morning LA time, doing call-ins until like 10, then going to sleep, going and do podcasts. I'm ready to just stop podcasting. Like, if I could, I would love to put everything on hold.

How long has this run been? Two weeks straight. But... It's been, you know, I still do phoners to radio stations, so I've been getting up at 6 in the morning, 4 in the morning LA time, doing call-ins until like 10, then going to sleep, going and do podcasts. I'm ready to just stop podcasting. Like, if I could, I would love to put everything on hold.

How long has this run been? Two weeks straight. But... It's been, you know, I still do phoners to radio stations, so I've been getting up at 6 in the morning, 4 in the morning LA time, doing call-ins until like 10, then going to sleep, going and do podcasts. I'm ready to just stop podcasting. Like, if I could, I would love to put everything on hold.

You know, I've heard from like three people now that I really respect that, You should put that podcasting is bad for stand-up.

You know, I've heard from like three people now that I really respect that, You should put that podcasting is bad for stand-up.

You know, I've heard from like three people now that I really respect that, You should put that podcasting is bad for stand-up.

I've heard Colin Quinn, Louis C.K., and a guy I won't say, say, Should stop podcasting and focus on stand-up. They're like, it's bad for stand-up.

I've heard Colin Quinn, Louis C.K., and a guy I won't say, say, Should stop podcasting and focus on stand-up. They're like, it's bad for stand-up.

I've heard Colin Quinn, Louis C.K., and a guy I won't say, say, Should stop podcasting and focus on stand-up. They're like, it's bad for stand-up.

Nate Bargatze, yeah.

Nate Bargatze, yeah.

Nate Bargatze, yeah.

Definitely five of those billion didn't come to my show. Yeah, so they were like, wow. Yeah, that is crazy. Yeah, I guess a special on Netflix probably pulls in, I'm guessing, 10 million.

Definitely five of those billion didn't come to my show. Yeah, so they were like, wow. Yeah, that is crazy. Yeah, I guess a special on Netflix probably pulls in, I'm guessing, 10 million.

Definitely five of those billion didn't come to my show. Yeah, so they were like, wow. Yeah, that is crazy. Yeah, I guess a special on Netflix probably pulls in, I'm guessing, 10 million.

Yeah, and I'm definitely not selling 10 million tickets.