John Delony

Our feelings job is not to tell us the truth.

They're to keep us safe.

So let me ask you the hard, hard question.

What is true?

Inside your marriage.

Because I hear you trying to be open-minded and open-hearted and expansive and forgiving and inclusive.

You're trying to be all of these things, but I want you to be honest about what is true in your marriage.

The sentence that's in my, in my head is the person you marry no longer exists.

Is that too big?

Is that too big of a stretch?

And for me, that's the question you have to answer, that I'm going to challenge you to not go ask anybody else, what should I do next?

That's a decision that you have to own.

I appreciate the call, man.

You're right.

It's hard.

Marriage is hard, especially when one of you starts changing and really transforming and exploring new identities and wanting to try things that were formerly way out of bounds values-wise and let's, you know...

Can we come back to the table and look at each other and say, okay, the marriage we had is over.

You've come back and put some big new things on the table, a new identity, a new sexual orientation, a new sexual practice you want to try that includes bringing other people in.

Do we want to build a new marriage together?

And that's the question all of us have to ask.