John Mulaney
👤 SpeakerAppearances Over Time
Podcast Appearances
I'm going to block a bridge and block an artery.
Yeah, so this is perfect for politicians because no one's going to get it.
Statistically, you being killed by bees is much greater statistically for your demise from a...
Swarm of bees.
I'm sure when this whole thing blows over in this time period, there will be more people killed by bees and falling trees than there will be Ebola.
But this is great for politicians because politicians talking about bees and trees, it's no good.
They don't get any traction with that.
That's right.
Because it looks like a mortuary?
It looks like a mortuary.
Put some windows in there, man.
Show off the goods.
This marriage is going to last forever because you're never fucking leaving this casket.
Yeah, maybe they should combine the two.
Times are tough.
That's right.
One-stop shopping.
I don't know why.
I don't know what a mortuary even looks like, but this bridal shop looks like a mortuary.