John Oliver

Oh, absolutely. I'm trained in all of the martial arts and the martial crafts. From... From jiu-jitsu to Brazilian capoeira to the Israeli krav maga to the Danish martial art of havarte.

Oh, absolutely. I'm trained in all of the martial arts and the martial crafts. From... From jiu-jitsu to Brazilian capoeira to the Israeli krav maga to the Danish martial art of havarte.

uh is a mild cheese right yes but on the right cracker it can be deadly john it it seems like mixed martial arts is really sort of exploding and coming into its own how did all this get started well john you might be surprised to learn that fighting has actually been around for a while in all of its various separate forms boxing wrestling passive aggression

uh is a mild cheese right yes but on the right cracker it can be deadly john it it seems like mixed martial arts is really sort of exploding and coming into its own how did all this get started well john you might be surprised to learn that fighting has actually been around for a while in all of its various separate forms boxing wrestling passive aggression

You don't really want to know. But mixed martial arts, as you might imagine, combines many different fighting techniques. A well-rounded fighter will combine many styles, or he can choose from a menu of up to 12 combat combos. I recommend the number five. It's judo. plus a side order of repeated elbow punching to the neck and unlimited fountain soda.

You don't really want to know. But mixed martial arts, as you might imagine, combines many different fighting techniques. A well-rounded fighter will combine many styles, or he can choose from a menu of up to 12 combat combos. I recommend the number five. It's judo. plus a side order of repeated elbow punching to the neck and unlimited fountain soda.

I don't recall that actually being... Combat combos, John. The important thing is, two men enter the ring, but only one man... Well, both men leave the ring, but only one of them does so, having won the fight. But I say ring, of course, because it's actually a cage, a cage that is shaped as an octagon.

I don't recall that actually being... Combat combos, John. The important thing is, two men enter the ring, but only one man... Well, both men leave the ring, but only one of them does so, having won the fight. But I say ring, of course, because it's actually a cage, a cage that is shaped as an octagon.

Well, that's a good question. What do you think?

Well, that's a good question. What do you think?

If you wanted people to fight in an eight-sided cage, wouldn't the natural choice of shape be an octagon? I'm not trying to embarrass you. It's just you ask me a question like that.

If you wanted people to fight in an eight-sided cage, wouldn't the natural choice of shape be an octagon? I'm not trying to embarrass you. It's just you ask me a question like that.

Well, first of all, this is not stage. It's not professional wrestling or soccer. These are real men really going at it on the floor of an octagon. I mean, it's no wonder that millions of Americans are forsaking the bloated pomposity of older sports for Ultimate Fighting's more authentic brand of homoeroticism. Those moves are beautiful. That's dancing as much as it is fighting.

Well, first of all, this is not stage. It's not professional wrestling or soccer. These are real men really going at it on the floor of an octagon. I mean, it's no wonder that millions of Americans are forsaking the bloated pomposity of older sports for Ultimate Fighting's more authentic brand of homoeroticism. Those moves are beautiful. That's dancing as much as it is fighting.

That's very graceful.

That's very graceful.

Good, because if you did, I'd have to, whoa, whoa, easy. Easy, Copernicus. Don't you get started, Kepler. I'm sorry. But I know.

Good, because if you did, I'd have to, whoa, whoa, easy. Easy, Copernicus. Don't you get started, Kepler. I'm sorry. But I know.

Well, why combine a cell phone with a camera?

Well, why combine a cell phone with a camera?