Jojo Moyes

None of this is going to your kids because even if you are tight-lipped and polite about your ex, they will feel it.

They will pick up on every vibration.

So

I would also say pick your battles.

Like, does it really matter?

I mean, I had dinner with Catherine Bedford, this divorce lawyer, and she was telling me about how, you know, some people will literally bankrupt themselves over who gets the guinea pig.

And you have to just say, does this really matter?

Does it matter?

And one of the other really important things was when we divided up the things in the house...

Although there were things that I loved that I let go of and we'd agreed that any family heirlooms should stick with any pictures.

But I wanted the kids when they went into his house to see things they recognised and to feel like they were at home.

I wanted them to be comfortable and I think he felt the same way.

So we were generous with each other at every point.

Yeah, I'm not going to say it was fun.

Yes.

You know what I mean?

And because he was a good man, we were able to talk honestly.

And at a point when some lawyers were advising me not to be honest with him, I was honest with him and trusted that he was still essentially the person that I'd married 22 years earlier.

And so it was.

And so now we talk about stuff all the time.