Jon Stewart

But this split is dividing the entire MAGA movement right now.

There's the anti-war side, with people like Joe Rogan, Tucker Carlson, and Megyn Kelly.

And there's the pro-war side, with Sean Hannity, Lindsey Graham, and Marc Levin.

And as you can imagine, the quality of an internal MAGA debate is highly intellectual.

Oh.

Feels like a bat at the Oxford Debate Club.

Be it resolved, that dick be tiny.

Now, it's not a good look for President Trump to have his followers fighting so publicly over their micropenises.

Donnie, why don't you step in and heal the divide?

Damn it, Megyn!

Damn it!

Oh!

It's obviously not fair to accuse Mark Levin of running to daddy about his micropenis.

Although I imagine having a micropenis makes the running a lot easier.

Totally unrelated, but in high school, I was the slowest guy in gym class.

By the way, did you notice that at no point did Trump deny the micropenis allegations?

Not exactly the full-throated defense you want.

He has a micropenis!

Hey!

He's a nice man!