Jon Stewart
👤 SpeakerAppearances Over Time
Podcast Appearances
Everyone is Irish on St.
Patrick's Day, but Brendan Fay wants to ruin everyone's good time.
But you're gay.
Your parade is in the summer.
But that's impossible, according to Reverend Lou Sheldon of the Traditional Values Coalition.
The Irish people are not homosexuals.
And he wants to protect the heterosexual march that is the St.
Patrick's Day parade.
The homosexuals want to rain on the St.
Patrick's Day parade.
The Reverend has valid reason for concern.
They do mouth-to-mouth, tongue-to-tongue kissing.
They grab each other in the rectum and in the private parts of the front.
These gay antics could ruin the St.
Patrick's Day parade.
Describe for me the St.
Patrick's Day parade.
Very majestic, very glorious, very religious, and a lot of dignity.
How can you be trusted not to turn the St.
Patrick's Day parade gay?