Chapter 1: What are the origins of St. Patrick's Day celebrations?
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Monday was St. Patrick's Day, when Irish Americans honor their heritage with careful readings of the writings of James Joyce, group performances of traditional Irish music, and a somber reflection of the beauty of the Celtic language. But how do you celebrate being Irish in the Donald Trump era? Michael Kosta hit the streets to find out. One of Trump's top priorities is getting rid of DEI.
DEI would have ruined our country, and now it's dead.
Identity Month are dead. Some of the months that they're targeting, Black History Month, Pride Month, National Hispanic Heritage Month, Asian American and Pacific Islander Heritage Month,
But even though he hates celebrating these minority groups, for some reason, there's one group he loves to celebrate, the Irish. Oh, I think the Irish love Trump. We won the Irish with a tremendous amount of votes. Great people. And they voted for me in heavy numbers, so I like them even more. So I stopped by New York's St.
Paddy's Day parade to see how Irish Trump supporters were celebrating their new status as Trump's BFFs.
All right, what brings you here today? I come here to be with my friends and to show Trump that I support him. Yeah, I guess I'm confused. Is this a Trump rally or is this an Irish parade?
It's an Irish Trump rally. Men in skirts? Trump is not going to like that. Do you stand for DEI? No, but we're here celebrating the minorities that are the Irish. Well, look. I'm very confused.
Back in the 1800s, the Irish were minorities. They were coming overseas when they came across the ocean.
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Chapter 2: How do Trump supporters celebrate St. Patrick's Day?
Look, I had, in a former life, I had a foreign-born spouse. Bye!
Kiss me, I'm Irish. That shirt's DEI. Kisses should be merit-based. Hey, look, I think celebrating Black History Month is good. I think celebrating MLK, who fought for our civil rights, is incredible. I went up against the mandates in New York City. I fought for my civil rights because I was being discriminated against for not getting vaccinated. Right.
This guy was just like MLK, except he didn't take a shot from the government. These Trump supporters also had a lot of other important observations. When I went to school, we had welding, we had shop. The kids don't have nothing anymore. They don't have that.
Nothing.
My father taught me how to put wires in, plumbing, all that stuff. These kids don't have it. You don't think dads are teaching kids how to put wires in anymore? No. There you have it. As long as Trump teaches kids how to put wires back in, he and the Irish are building a friendship that will last a lifetime. Well, that was quick.
Pink hearts, yellow moons, green clovers, two black eyes, and a nasty hangover. Today is St. Paddy's Day, and all over the country, thousands of Angela's asses hit the streets to celebrate, making it a great day for the Irish, but just an okay day if you were looking for a quiet tavern to talk, read, or have a white wine spritzer. Here in New York, parade goers showed their true colors.
Back to the day is our heritage. We gotta be here to see this parade and respect the other people that are Irish. You know what I'm saying?
Some people just command respect for their people, don't they? But not everyone celebrates the same way. Meet Lucy McLaughlin, an Irish woman living in New Zealand. Lucy's stupid. For her St. Patty celebration, this plucky Irish lass had someone paint her plucky Irish ass, and then she jumped off a bridge.
Lucy came up with the idea after her mother got upset with her for partying with friends one night and said to her, and if your friends painted themselves green and jumped off a bridge naked, would you do that too? Lucy... Lucy, you've got some splaining to do.
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Chapter 3: What controversies surround the St. Patrick's Day parade?
Backlash? I don't know where you're getting your information from, John, because I don't think it could be any gayer. Men openly marching in skirts, sucking on large pipes attached to hairy sacks. Of course, we all know that Cardinal O'Connor did approve the ban on gays in deference to St.
Patrick, who, by the way, changed his name from Maewyn Suket upon entering the priesthood, a tradition continued by priests to this very day. mainly to avoid the hassles of Megan's Law. Thank you very much, Vance. Excellent reporting. Please drive safely and remember to take your hand out of your ear.
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The nation celebrates St. Patrick's Day. Sawdust and Lysol manufacturers celebrate day after St. Patrick's Day. Saturday was St. Patrick's Day, and throughout the land, proud Irish-Americans poured into one of three million bars named the Blarney Stone to drink green beer and to pretend Van Morrison's Moondance takes them back to the hills of old Dunkilgarni Derry. Yonah Burdeen, no glanner.
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Chapter 4: How does the St. Patrick's Day parade reflect cultural identity?
How pleasing. To the delight of those gathered, the Backpipe Ensemble later took requests to play their other song. Which is actually that song, just faster. This year's parade once again excluded Irish American gays and lesbians. And once again, they were not pleased about it.
We're Irish, we're queer, and so are some of you.
We're Irish, we're queer, and so are some of you. All right, may not rhyme, but a quick note to the protesters. Next year, come up with a chant before the pub crawl. After the parade, many in the group made their way to the city's only gay Irish pub, Fisty McCramden Hands. There's old Fisty. And of course, again, cowboys drink free.
And in Washington, President Bush met with Irish Prime Minister Bertie Ahern to discuss the peace process.
as the British and Irish governments and the political parties now work together to complete the implementation of the Good Friday Agreement. It is good to be able to count on true friends.
Ahern then turned to Bush and said, and of course a true friend wouldn't keep trying to get me to say they're magically delicious. A recent poll found that while most Irish Americans know that St. Patrick was the patron saint of parades, few were aware how his parade has become the subject of great controversy. Morocco reports on how sometimes the luck of the Irish isn't enough.
Everyone is Irish on St. Patrick's Day, but Brendan Fay wants to ruin everyone's good time.
What I want is for Irish lesbian and gay people to march in the St. Patrick's parade under our own banner.
But you're gay. Your parade is in the summer.
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Chapter 5: What unique St. Patrick's Day traditions are highlighted?
Where's the gay in that? I don't see any. The prancing part. Is that a little bit gay? Oh, no, no. A lot of people like to prance. But what does mean something is protecting his heritage. As an Irish Catholic, you feel offended. I'm a Presbyterian. So, as an Irish Presbyterian, you feel offended. My father was English. My mother was an Orthodox Jew.
So as an English Presbyterian Orthodox Jew, you feel very protective of the St. Patrick's Day parade? That's right. The point is, a Faye conspiracy is afoot. Today, the Irish parade. Tomorrow, the Irish. Anybody they can land in their court, they're going to use. They might go after Liam Neeson. They certainly might go after Liam Neeson. U2? They may go after U2.
They could even go after Rosie O'Donnell. They already have Rosie O'Donnell. She's already gay. They got her. Rosie O'Donnell has a huge crush on Tom Cruise. Those gays are unstoppable. If they got Rosie, no one is safe. They might even get the Lord of the Dance.
Mo Rocco, ladies and gentlemen.
Well done, well done. Do you think that the St. Patrick's Day parade will change if gay people march in it? Not really, John. Let's face it, a parade is inherently gay. I mean, think about it. A crowd of singers and a gaggle of dancers perched atop floats, brightly painted paper mache. Yeah, but Mo, not all parades. I mean, what about military parades? Oh, John, come on. Uniforms, boots, chaps.
It's even gayer. Chaps? What branch of the military wears chaps? Well, the cavalry, John. Mounted privates. I mean, how gay do you want it? Thank you, Mo.
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Chapter 6: How do different communities celebrate St. Patrick's Day?
Mo Rocca, we'll be right back. As we know, our streets are boiling over in anger at these AIG bonus payments. John Oliver joins us now with more. John, we had you out there. We had you out there talking to the people. What was the atmosphere like? How are people feeling? Well, John, I might be a journalist first, but I'm a person second. And what I saw this afternoon was a nation in pain.
Roll it, Chuck. The AIG bonus payments have sparked a populist uprising. People have been here since 8 in the morning, stewing in their own anger. AIG bonus payment? That is . They were here to send a very clear message to Washington. The economy sucks. the economy. 165 million in bonuses just seems morally reprehensible. They're the Bank of America, clearly. The government doesn't run the bank.
The government doesn't run the bank. What do you think of the argument that AIG is simply too big to fail?
Too big to fail! They're angry at the bonus schemes! They're angry at the bailout! They want to be heard!
This woman is pressing her breasts up against my arm in an uncomfortable manner! Some were simply too angry for words. and best day of the year. While others were inappropriately articulate.
It's because it's a decoupling of performance from pay, which creates a series of perverse incentives that have been very much undermining the credibility.
And the AIG controversy was just one of the scandals which brought people into the street.
Bernie Madoff is stealing. J-E-T-S. Jets, jets, jets, jets!
In the hour and a half that I've been here, John, I've seen people passing out in anger, throwing up in anger, pissing up against the side of buildings in anger. All these people, John, working at investment banks just eight weeks ago, now out here to protest.
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Chapter 7: What humorous incidents occur during St. Patrick's Day celebrations?
Yeah!
John Oliver, everybody. John Oliver. We'll be right back after this.
Are you all right? Happy St. Patrick's Day, everybody. I have to be honest, I don't really know much about St. Patrick, but judging by the way people honor him, his most famous miracle must have been turning nine pints of beer into 10 pints of vomit.
Apparently, this is supposed to be a religious holiday. Now, I'm no biblical scholar, but I don't remember Jesus telling his followers to commit literally every sin possible. until their bodies shut off. That's not something I remember. Look, obviously, the truth is St. Patrick's Day isn't very big in Africa.
You're not gonna get a Nigerian guy who's like, ah, today everyone is Irish. In America, though, a lot of people don't know this. Black people are the whole reason St. Patrick's Day happens. You see, because by not participating, you can have six million drunk white people screaming on the streets. Yeah. But if one black guy showed up, one black guy, the cops would be like, okay, shut it down.
Shut it down. Shut it down. It's a riot. It's a riot. So you're welcome. You're welcome, white people. Enjoy it.
Happy St. Patrick's Day for tomorrow, everybody. It's gonna be exciting. I believe the parade is back on. Exciting times. You know what's gonna be fun this year is seeing some of the people who still wanna wear a mask, but wanna be a part of a parade, which is completely fine. Some people still wanna wear masks to certain things, but they're gonna do it.
It's gonna be interesting to see how masks handle it when you throw up inside of them. Because we've done everything with our masks, but this is gonna be a great new thing to see how it works, you know? Just like inside the mask. It might actually help, because a lot of the time, the throwing up, the thing that makes it terrible is that it goes out.
A lot of the time, I've thought, ah, I didn't want this to go out. I just could have kept it in. Welcome back. Before we go, we're going to check in with a good friend, Stephen Colbert of The Colbert Report. Stephen, happy St. Patrick's Day to you, boy. Sure and begora, my friend. How are you, John? Wow. I didn't even know that was in there.
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Chapter 8: What is the significance of St. Patrick's Day in modern America?
Well done, Seamus Colbert. Thank you very much. I'm excited for another St. Patrick's Day and then, obviously, the Passover parade for my people. Absolutely. Yes. Yes. Yes. Now, they hurl frogs and locusts at you while you're... Exactly. Here's what happens. We all drink Manischewitz, get in a line and march. Actually, it's not really a parade. More of an exodus. Yeah.
Yeah.
WE'RE LEAVING. THAT WAS THE ORIGINAL. Now here it is, your moment of Zen. And we'll be seeing you at 11. Join in the Irish dance we've got going with you. This afternoon, some clouds around. Now we're about to commute this morning.
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