Jonathan Fields

So that's people who love me for me and people who will be there for me.

When you say to people, start doing that yourself, are you talking about directed towards other people or directed towards yourself?

Where does vulnerability fall on that list?

So then how does somebody earn your story?

My curiosity is really around the role of vulnerability in finding lasting love.

And because it's uncomfortable for so many people to, quote, go there.

Or as you described, sometimes people just go there out of the gate and you sort of get fire hosed with sometimes performative vulnerability.

Yeah.

So I think we all have, we're tuned into this sense that this is something that really matters in the context of deep, lasting relationships, loving relationships.

But it's a real dance too.

And there's so much often cultural baggage involved.

around how and when you do or don't offer vulnerability.

But if nobody does, and I'm curious, in my experience, if nobody ever opens that door, there is no relationship, no matter how many of the stars align.

And we'll be right back after a word from our sponsors.

So let's say somebody has been either out of the dating world for a substantial amount of time or for whatever reason it may be.

They're stepping back into it.

They're really nervous and really uncomfortable and they haven't done this thing in a very long time.

Are there one, two, three, four sort of moments

fairly universal questions that you might guide somebody to like, and the fear is like, I'm going to go, I'm going to sit down, I'm going to freeze.

I'm not going to know what to say.