Jonquilyn Hill

And so they come across a little decorative figurine. And then without anyone but Iris noticing, Teddy takes the figurine off the bookshelf and hides it under his sweater. Teddy makes eye contact with Iris, who mouths, what are you doing? And Teddy winks and then gives a signal that says, he'll explain later, just play it cool for now. What do you think is going on?

And so they come across a little decorative figurine. And then without anyone but Iris noticing, Teddy takes the figurine off the bookshelf and hides it under his sweater. Teddy makes eye contact with Iris, who mouths, what are you doing? And Teddy winks and then gives a signal that says, he'll explain later, just play it cool for now. What do you think is going on?

Yes, in the first season? Yeah. But also, ugh, this is why I hate praying. Stop. Be normal. So, since Iris has lived in the townhouse for about nine months now, she is more than familiar with the figurine that Teddy has just nicked. It is about, like, eight inches in height, and it's made from that sort of shiny gold metal that almost everything in anthropology is made out of. Mm.

Yes, in the first season? Yeah. But also, ugh, this is why I hate praying. Stop. Be normal. So, since Iris has lived in the townhouse for about nine months now, she is more than familiar with the figurine that Teddy has just nicked. It is about, like, eight inches in height, and it's made from that sort of shiny gold metal that almost everything in anthropology is made out of. Mm.

But the most important thing about this statue is that it looks exactly like Noodle the dog. It looks so much like Noodle that when Iris first noticed it a few months after she moved in, she had asked Blake which had come first, the dog or the dog statue.

But the most important thing about this statue is that it looks exactly like Noodle the dog. It looks so much like Noodle that when Iris first noticed it a few months after she moved in, she had asked Blake which had come first, the dog or the dog statue.

Blake had sort of rolled his eyes and been like, ugh, that fucking thing is so tacky, before explaining that it had been a wedding gift, one of those things that he and Michael had thrown onto their registry after too many Proseccos. He'd actually wanted to get rid of it when it showed up on their doorstep, but Michael had fallen in love with the little gold statue.

Blake had sort of rolled his eyes and been like, ugh, that fucking thing is so tacky, before explaining that it had been a wedding gift, one of those things that he and Michael had thrown onto their registry after too many Proseccos. He'd actually wanted to get rid of it when it showed up on their doorstep, but Michael had fallen in love with the little gold statue.

The shelf that Teddy had just nicked the statue off of was even specially built into the bookcase by Michael just to display the statue. That's a little crazy. So as soon as Iris gets a moment to ask, she's like, Teddy, why did you take that statue? You know Michael loves that thing, right?

The shelf that Teddy had just nicked the statue off of was even specially built into the bookcase by Michael just to display the statue. That's a little crazy. So as soon as Iris gets a moment to ask, she's like, Teddy, why did you take that statue? You know Michael loves that thing, right?

And Teddy kind of starts giggling before revealing that he had actually been the one to buy the statue off the wedding registry. Because Teddy was knowingly a B-list invitation to Michael and Blake's wedding. This is actually one of Teddy's favorite situations to be in. He loves being the fun friend that's invited after Great Aunt Mildred decides not to attend.

And Teddy kind of starts giggling before revealing that he had actually been the one to buy the statue off the wedding registry. Because Teddy was knowingly a B-list invitation to Michael and Blake's wedding. This is actually one of Teddy's favorite situations to be in. He loves being the fun friend that's invited after Great Aunt Mildred decides not to attend.

But part of being that friend meant that almost everything that was both affordable and practical on Blake and Michael's wedding registry had already been bought by the time Teddy was invited. Thus, the dog statue. And now Teddy has a brilliant idea for the dog statue. He wants to pull a prank. Huge news!

But part of being that friend meant that almost everything that was both affordable and practical on Blake and Michael's wedding registry had already been bought by the time Teddy was invited. Thus, the dog statue. And now Teddy has a brilliant idea for the dog statue. He wants to pull a prank. Huge news!

Our Dowager Queen, Kelsey McKinney, wrote a New York Times best-selling book of beautiful essays about gossip. It's called You Didn't Hear This From Me, mostly true notes on gossip, and I am obsessed. It's about how we use gossip to learn about ourselves. It's about Britney Spears and Weston Caleb and Gilgamesh and Picasso. It's so fun.

Our Dowager Queen, Kelsey McKinney, wrote a New York Times best-selling book of beautiful essays about gossip. It's called You Didn't Hear This From Me, mostly true notes on gossip, and I am obsessed. It's about how we use gossip to learn about ourselves. It's about Britney Spears and Weston Caleb and Gilgamesh and Picasso. It's so fun.

And not to be biased, but I kind of think it's pretty excellent. It's out right now in a hardback and a super sexy audiobook, which Kelsey narrates. You can buy wherever you buy your books. You can also go to KelseyMcKinneyBook.com to see all retailers.

And not to be biased, but I kind of think it's pretty excellent. It's out right now in a hardback and a super sexy audiobook, which Kelsey narrates. You can buy wherever you buy your books. You can also go to KelseyMcKinneyBook.com to see all retailers.

Teddy has this brilliant idea of doing a flat Stanley with the Noodle the Dog statue, which basically entails taking pictures of the Noodle the Dog statue in various locations across the city. Do you remember Teddy's rules for a good prank?

Teddy has this brilliant idea of doing a flat Stanley with the Noodle the Dog statue, which basically entails taking pictures of the Noodle the Dog statue in various locations across the city. Do you remember Teddy's rules for a good prank?