Jordan Schlansky

Are you getting any money from Charmin? No. Clearly not. I just criticize them. But at the same time, I do appreciate the quality of the paper. That has not changed. Nevertheless, their new packaging inside the outer package with the bear is just a generic plastic case. My guests think that I'm buying from like Costco or something like that. They don't know it's Charmin.

I'm saying if you are, if you are that person, I got you covered. If you're a normal person, you're covered too. Okay, so next time I come to your house. You're going to have plenty of toilet paper and you may not use it. And that's fine. I don't expect you to use it. But if you need to use it, it's there. You will never have to ask me for more toilet paper. Do you imagine the humiliation?

I'm saying if you are, if you are that person, I got you covered. If you're a normal person, you're covered too. Okay, so next time I come to your house. You're going to have plenty of toilet paper and you may not use it. And that's fine. I don't expect you to use it. But if you need to use it, it's there. You will never have to ask me for more toilet paper. Do you imagine the humiliation?

I'm saying if you are, if you are that person, I got you covered. If you're a normal person, you're covered too. Okay, so next time I come to your house. You're going to have plenty of toilet paper and you may not use it. And that's fine. I don't expect you to use it. But if you need to use it, it's there. You will never have to ask me for more toilet paper. Do you imagine the humiliation?

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Do you have any more toilet paper? I gave you plenty of toilet paper. I need more toilet paper.

Do you have any more toilet paper? I gave you plenty of toilet paper. I need more toilet paper.

Do you have any more toilet paper? I gave you plenty of toilet paper. I need more toilet paper.

That would be that would be unexpected. I don't want to give them cases. I'm not going to put cases in there. That's ridiculous. But I'd like to put a six pack. I have a question for you.

That would be that would be unexpected. I don't want to give them cases. I'm not going to put cases in there. That's ridiculous. But I'd like to put a six pack. I have a question for you.

That would be that would be unexpected. I don't want to give them cases. I'm not going to put cases in there. That's ridiculous. But I'd like to put a six pack. I have a question for you.

I have adaptive techniques, as Darwin has showed us. The key to survival is not strength, but adaptability. I adapt to any situation.

I have adaptive techniques, as Darwin has showed us. The key to survival is not strength, but adaptability. I adapt to any situation.

I have adaptive techniques, as Darwin has showed us. The key to survival is not strength, but adaptability. I adapt to any situation.

I believe in orienting the puborectalis muscle in a certain position to allow a greater elimination at home. And I have devices that yield this result at home.

I believe in orienting the puborectalis muscle in a certain position to allow a greater elimination at home. And I have devices that yield this result at home.

I believe in orienting the puborectalis muscle in a certain position to allow a greater elimination at home. And I have devices that yield this result at home.

Okay, but when I travel... What erectus bone? When I travel, I don't have access to my devices, so I improvise.