Jordan Schlansky

What's the power balance on this show, if it is, in fact, ours? Well, let's take a look at the order of the names. The Conan and Jordan show.

What's the power balance on this show, if it is, in fact, ours? Well, let's take a look at the order of the names. The Conan and Jordan show.

Yeah, big Conan and then sort of little scripted Jordan. I think you understand what the power balance is here. You're here because I allow you to be here. You live because I allow you to live. And maybe you're just someone that I imagined and you think you have a life. But the minute I stop thinking about you, you'll disappear. Fascinating. So let's talk. Man in motion.

Yeah, big Conan and then sort of little scripted Jordan. I think you understand what the power balance is here. You're here because I allow you to be here. You live because I allow you to live. And maybe you're just someone that I imagined and you think you have a life. But the minute I stop thinking about you, you'll disappear. Fascinating. So let's talk. Man in motion.

Yeah, big Conan and then sort of little scripted Jordan. I think you understand what the power balance is here. You're here because I allow you to be here. You live because I allow you to live. And maybe you're just someone that I imagined and you think you have a life. But the minute I stop thinking about you, you'll disappear. Fascinating. So let's talk. Man in motion.

I do encourage the listeners to try and discern the last part of the song because that's an important use of everyone's time.

I do encourage the listeners to try and discern the last part of the song because that's an important use of everyone's time.

I do encourage the listeners to try and discern the last part of the song because that's an important use of everyone's time.

I think what people will take from this is. is a newfound hatred for you. They thought they hated you before, but now they're going to go look. Before it was, if I cross paths with Jordan, I'll smash his face. Now it's going to be, I've got to find out where that fucker is, and I need to take him out at the knees. That's what it's going to be now.

I think what people will take from this is. is a newfound hatred for you. They thought they hated you before, but now they're going to go look. Before it was, if I cross paths with Jordan, I'll smash his face. Now it's going to be, I've got to find out where that fucker is, and I need to take him out at the knees. That's what it's going to be now.

I think what people will take from this is. is a newfound hatred for you. They thought they hated you before, but now they're going to go look. Before it was, if I cross paths with Jordan, I'll smash his face. Now it's going to be, I've got to find out where that fucker is, and I need to take him out at the knees. That's what it's going to be now.

It'll be the first thing out of my mouth. Okay. Okay? I promise it. I'll write it on my hand. Yeah. All right? Swear to God. Go ahead. Usually it's how are you? Yeah. I like to try and ease into it. Small talk. Yeah, I understand. That makes people feel comfortable. Are you comfortable? Yeah. That's all. That's my technique. But as a robot, you would know that. You have your own techniques.

It'll be the first thing out of my mouth. Okay. Okay? I promise it. I'll write it on my hand. Yeah. All right? Swear to God. Go ahead. Usually it's how are you? Yeah. I like to try and ease into it. Small talk. Yeah, I understand. That makes people feel comfortable. Are you comfortable? Yeah. That's all. That's my technique. But as a robot, you would know that. You have your own techniques.

It'll be the first thing out of my mouth. Okay. Okay? I promise it. I'll write it on my hand. Yeah. All right? Swear to God. Go ahead. Usually it's how are you? Yeah. I like to try and ease into it. Small talk. Yeah, I understand. That makes people feel comfortable. Are you comfortable? Yeah. That's all. That's my technique. But as a robot, you would know that. You have your own techniques.

Jordan, this is what we have to do. We have to do a quick commercial. The sponsor now is Lady Crackers. Oh, yes. Why don't you just give an ad for Lady Crackers right now and just make it up as you go. Lady Crackers, Los Angeles, olive oil and sea salt.

Jordan, this is what we have to do. We have to do a quick commercial. The sponsor now is Lady Crackers. Oh, yes. Why don't you just give an ad for Lady Crackers right now and just make it up as you go. Lady Crackers, Los Angeles, olive oil and sea salt.

Jordan, this is what we have to do. We have to do a quick commercial. The sponsor now is Lady Crackers. Oh, yes. Why don't you just give an ad for Lady Crackers right now and just make it up as you go. Lady Crackers, Los Angeles, olive oil and sea salt.

Can I just confirm? Can I confirm? One second. Can I confirm? Frank, he had no idea what I was going to hand him. No idea. This is not written. There's no copy. There's no copy. This is absolute. What are you doing? How are you able to do that?

Can I just confirm? Can I confirm? One second. Can I confirm? Frank, he had no idea what I was going to hand him. No idea. This is not written. There's no copy. There's no copy. This is absolute. What are you doing? How are you able to do that?

Can I just confirm? Can I confirm? One second. Can I confirm? Frank, he had no idea what I was going to hand him. No idea. This is not written. There's no copy. There's no copy. This is absolute. What are you doing? How are you able to do that?