Josh Gondelman

either despite or because of how gross it sounds.

I can't find any dang fish anymore, lamented Clem Swenson, a career long hauler.

I've had to resort to biting my own hand or slathering my fingers in barbecue sauce and enticing a stray dog to do it.

On a brighter note, the paucity of Betta fish has caused Swenson to bond more closely with the one he already has.

He even gave his aquatic companion a radio call sign of his very own, Vince Gills.

Wait, maybe I'm an Olympic swimmer then.

Have you tried Olympic swimming, Josh?

It's the last one I've been waiting to attempt.

It did not pan out.

He had murdered 11 security guards.

Why did you tell me to do my nails for the Olympic trials?

Yeah, we should be able to take that away from people.

There should be people that are outfluencers that see that trend taking off and they go, stop it, stop it.

I'm ready.

That's the sound of romance.

Clacking.

They call it the devil's shuffleboard.

Or as they call it in Minnesota, a potluck.

We know what you're doing.

Yeah, that's right.